Burt Prelutsky

I, for one, was extremely upset about the storming of the American embassy in Cairo, Egypt. Perhaps I should be more specific. It wasn't the storming itself that angered me. We have all come to expect that sort of thing from the non-Israeli inhabitants of the Middle East. What pissed me off was that in the aftermath, the U.S. apologized. Apparently it is now our official policy to speak softly and carry no stick at all.

I also fear that our response may act as precedence in other areas. For instance, it may now be incumbent on rape victims to apologize to their attackers.

At the Charlotte convention, Sandra Fluke -- the so-called Georgetown University law student who never seems to go to class or take tests, sort of like the Left's favorite ministers, Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson, who never seem to give sermons or even attend church -- claimed that Mitt Romney and the Republicans "want to make us endure invasive ultrasound." I found it interesting that a woman, whom I suspect doesn't really have to concern herself with the availability of birth control pills, regards an ultrasound procedure as invasive, but not an abortion.

But I'm sure that if anyone tried to pin Ms. Fluke down as to what it is about ultrasound that makes it invasive, she would become instantly evasive.

I don't know what to make of the polls that suggest that Obama is running neck-and-neck or even slightly ahead of Mitt Romney. Although I have my suspicions, I will continue to predict a Romney victory in November. As I have said all along, if you didn't vote for Obama in 2008, he certainly hasn't given you any good reason to vote for him this time. On the other hand, if you were dumb enough to fall for "Hope & Change" back then, you've now had four long years in which to wake up and face the truth about this snake oil salesman.

I'm not saying that millions of people won't vote for Obama and Biden. After all, in spite of the millions of unemployed and underemployed, in spite of the $16 trillion national debt and the annual one trillion dollar deficit, there are about 15 million more Americans now receiving bribes in the form of food stamps.

Besides that, Americans, in huge numbers, have become accustomed to voting for American Idol competitors. As a result, they have taken to voting for the president on the same juvenile basis, asking themselves not to judge a man on his experience, decency and temperament, but merely on whether he's cool and groovy in front of the TV camera.

When I look at millions of my countrymen today, I'm reminded that grass smells best when it's freshly cut; leaves look their best when they're dying and smell their best when they're burning. Too bad none of that will be able to be said for America as it reaches the end of its rope if Obama is re-elected. If he remains in the Oval Office, I'm afraid that the pervasive stench of America would be that of an open sewer.

As bad as some of our presidents have been, one never had reason to think he wasn't proud to be an American and the leader of the free world. Even when Obama pays verbal respect to America's military and the nation's exceptionalism, one can't help feeling an emotional disconnect. He sounds so much more believable when he's lauding some labor union boss or promising stuff from his goody bag to college students and welfare recipients.

Never, not even when FDR spent over 12 years in the White House, has a president seemed so much like the sort of cult figure we're used to seeing in places like Nazi Germany, the Soviet Union, Cuba, China and Iraq. Given another four years, I would assume we'd start seeing Obama statues popping up in public places.

This brings us to Obama's hometown where the teachers are striking in spite of the fact that they are already being paid $76,000-a-year, not counting pensions, in a city where the average taxpayer only makes $47,000. What makes it even more farcical is that the Teachers Union has already been offered a new contract that calls for a 16% increase over the next four years. In case you are a product of the Chicago public school system, the 16% bump would raise the annual salary to $88,160.

It seems that the teachers find the pay hike acceptable. What they resent is that school principals would actually have the authority to fire the incompetents. But that has been an overriding issue for most unions over the past few decades. Teachers always insist that every work stoppage is for the kids, but inevitably it's either for their wallets or, as in this case, to protect the deadheads who nevertheless can be relied on to pay their union dues.

Karen Lewis, the 350-pound President of the Chicago Teachers Union, while addressing the North West Teaching for Social Justice Conference in Seattle last year, said, "I am the only black woman in the class of 1974 from Dartmouth College. Woo! People are impressed. Let me tell you, I spent those years smoking lots of weed, self-medicating."

When their laughter died down, Ms. Lewis added: "Sounds like you all did, too."

No word whether Barack Obama was in the audience or was merely being channeled by President Lewis.

Perhaps the most telling fact of all in the Chicago strike is that Chicago school children are among the worst-educated in the country. Perhaps part of the reason is that they have the shortest school day, running only five-and-a-half hours long, thanks to previous teacher contracts.

So, if you're one of those people who continue to believe that school teachers are underpaid and overworked, I won't try to convince you how silly you are and how unfair it is that the people who pay their salaries make, on average, roughly half as much as they do. I will merely point out that, however you slice it, $76,000-a-year is a hell of a lot of money to pay a babysitter.