The Patriot Post® · The Late Barack Obama

I apologize if some of you read the title of this piece and leapt to the conclusion that Joe Biden had ascended to the Oval Office, not that that would be cause for dancing in the street. Biden, after all, is a great champion of the Affordable Care Act and has been wrong when it comes to foreign affairs for nearly as long as Obama has been alive.

No, I was referring to Obama’s lack of punctuality. He is not only late when it comes to delivering his annual budgets, laughable as they are, but he’s even late when it comes to delivering his speeches, and we all know how much he loves the sound of his own voice. I can’t count the times that someone at Fox News – usually Bret Baier – would announce that Obama was about to deliver a speech, and 10 minutes later, he still hadn’t shown up. The camera would show the microphone, but there’d be nobody there. Finally, he’d stroll in – no explanation, no apology – and there would still be nobody, just an empty suit at the microphone.

What it tells you when someone is habitually late is that he regards himself as not only more important than anyone else, but more important than everyone else.

Next, I’m afraid I have to be more careful about my jokes. For instance, a while ago I pointed out that the administration was boasting about the decrease in the rate of unemployment, while ignoring the fact that the decline was entirely attributable to the millions of Americans who had simply stopped seeking jobs. I predicted that if things continued that way, eventually both the employment and unemployment rates would be zero.

Almost before I got the words typed, we heard that ObamaCare would cost us 2.3 million jobs, while an increased minimum wage would cost between 500,000 and a million jobs. What’s worse, the Democrats are actually trying to stick a smiley face on it. Cripes, isn’t there anyone in this regime who can take a joke?

Nancy Pelosi insisted that the loss of all those jobs would be wonderful because people would be free to pursue their dreams, unless, of course, their dreams involved actually working fulltime and earning a decent living.

If you sit down and read the Constitution, you will find that our forefathers, employing remarkable prescience, protected us from just about every imaginable contingency. The one thing they couldn’t protect us from was ourselves – and the electoral power of the lazy, the ignorant, the greedy and the envious.

Kathleen Willey, one of the many women Bill Clinton sexually assaulted, has recently pointed out that his wife aided and abetted him every inch of the way, starting way back when he was still the governor of Arkansas. Whereas the Democrats never stop accusing Republicans of waging war on women, Ms. Willey is right on the money when she says that Hillary Clinton is the war on women.

She’s exactly right. Not content with trashing the women that her husband attacked, Hillary Clinton dismissed all the women who accused ex-Sen. Bob Packwood of similar actions as “whiners.” How he treated his female staffers was of absolutely no concern either to Mrs. Clinton or to her vile cohorts in NOW. What mattered was that Mrs. Clinton felt she needed his vote in the Senate in order to help pass HillaryCare. And let us not forget that it was HillaryCare, not RomneyCare, which was really the precursor to the nightmare we know as ObamaCare.

Honesty compels me to admit that I can’t stand anything about Mrs. Clinton, including her voice, her eyes and that awful grimace that passes for a smile. In fact, I have always felt that when it came to the Clintons, as with the Obamas, it was the wives who possessed the Y chromosome.

Speaking of males and females, a textbook used at South Carolina University insists that Ronald Reagan, who not only appointed a woman to be Ambassador to the U.N., but, unfortunately, saw to it that Sandra Day O'Connor would be the first female justice on the Supreme Court, was a misogynist. The partisan textbook aside, I doubt that any woman would stay married to a misogynist for 52 years, putting up with a ton of embarrassing crap, unless, of course, she felt she had to in order to run for president herself.

I do not understand why the House Republicans are so reluctant to use the one power they possess, that of the purse, to rein in Obama. After all, if your kid acts like a spoiled brat, you cut off his allowance, and there’s never been a bigger brat than the one acting up in the Oval Office.

Finally, I am not one to sniff at free market capitalism, but I nearly keeled over when I heard that an Oregon company is selling action figures of Edward Snowden, Julian Assange and Eric Holder. I don’t know about the others, but if you want your very own Snowden, it will cost you $99 or just $60, if you merely want the little head, perhaps to stick on a little pike.

After wondering why anyone would want any of these figures, assuming they’re not into voodoo, the next question that comes to mind is what actions would be the most appropriate. The best I could come up with is that you might wind up the Snowden doll and watch it run off to Russia; wind up Assange and watch it sneak into your private papers; or wind up Holder and watch it sell weapons to Mexican gangster dolls.