April 14, 2014

The Churchills: Ward & Winston

In my book, “67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die,” one of the questions I asked of all my subjects, who ranged, alphabetically, from Ablow, Keith, a prominent psychiatrist, to Zucker, David, a famous screenwriter-director, was which eight people who had ever lived, they would invite to a dinner party. Being conservatives, it wasn’t too surprising that two people who would never have to pay for another meal if they ever showed up ready to tie on the old feedbag, were Jesus Christ and Winston Churchill. I have a feeling that if I had, God forbid, interviewed liberals, Bill Clinton, Barack Obama and even the phony Indian, Ward Churchill, would have wound up with a lot of meal tickets. Although perhaps by this time, Ward might have to give up his seat to make way for that other phony Indian, Sen. Elizabeth Warren, at the big pow-wow.

In my book, “67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die,” one of the questions I asked of all my subjects, who ranged, alphabetically, from Ablow, Keith, a prominent psychiatrist, to Zucker, David, a famous screenwriter-director, was which eight people who had ever lived, they would invite to a dinner party.

Being conservatives, it wasn’t too surprising that two people who would never have to pay for another meal if they ever showed up ready to tie on the old feedbag, were Jesus Christ and Winston Churchill.

I have a feeling that if I had, God forbid, interviewed liberals, Bill Clinton, Barack Obama and even the phony Indian, Ward Churchill, would have wound up with a lot of meal tickets. Although perhaps by this time, Ward might have to give up his seat to make way for that other phony Indian, Sen. Elizabeth Warren, at the big pow-wow.

Still, I think that when trying to get a handle on the distinctions between Democrats and Republicans, you won’t go wrong if you compare how those in either group feels about the two Churchills, as does the regard in which the two groups hold, say, Margaret Thatcher and Hillary Clinton or, for that matter, God and Barack Obama.

Speaking of he who has managed to yank the title of Worst President in U.S. History from the grasp of Jimmy Carter, the one thing you have to admire about him is that he’s never content to rest on his withered laurels. Instead, we get to watch him go public with his predictions in the NCAA basketball tournament while Vladimir Putin rolls his tanks into the Crimea and his Russian cohorts tweet insults in America’s direction. Obama certainly gives “March Madness” a whole new meaning.

Frankly, it was something of an eye-opener for me. In past years, when he made his tournament selections, I assumed he was tossing a bone to his base – the young and stupid, which sounds like the name of a soap opera. But this year, because of what the Russian bear has been up to, he has convinced me that in what passes for his mind, a college basketball competition really is more important than the fact the world is perched on the precipice of what could be World War III.

As for what’s happening in Eastern Europe, a friend sent me the following: “The U.N. Security Council is deeply concerned with the situation in Ukraine. The reason being that so far, no possible reason to blame Israel has been found.”

Even if I were to bang my head on something, knock myself out and wake up thinking I was a Democrat, I’d like to think I would question how it is that Barack Obama can keep taking multi-million dollar vacations, only to come back in time to lecture his guests at $35,000-a-plate fund-raisers about the horrors of income inequality.

When you get right down to it, if poor people didn’t exist, the Democrats would have had to invent them. In that respect, as well as others, they resemble drug dealers who are constantly turning dummies into addicts.

Finally, I don’t often send emails to people I don’t actually know unless they write to me first. So, although radio talk show host Hugh Hewitt is a subject in my book, “67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die,” I’ve never met him. We conducted the interview via email.

But the other day, after listening to his show and one of his usual pleas for charitable donations, I sent him the following message:

“Dear Mr. Hewitt: You are obviously a good man, but these food drives you regularly conduct seem to be pointless because there is never an end to them. Has it ever occurred to you that instead of constantly trying to provide food for the needy around the world who can’t feed their own children, you might consider promoting birth control?

"On one of the spots, I recall you mentioned a woman who had six children she couldn’t feed. I understand that the children already exist, but the fact remains that there are Americans who might like to have six children or two or even one, but don’t because they know they won’t be able to support them.

"I hate the idea of children starving in Haiti and Guatemala or anywhere else on earth, but your food drives put me in mind of the line from the Bible about the difference between giving someone a fish and teaching that person to fish. You don’t even try telling them how to bait a hook.

"I’m not trying to get you to stop what you’re doing, but you’re not really addressing the main issue if you don’t at the same time get serious about the major cause of the problem. And that doesn’t happen to be the generosity or lack of generosity of your listening audience, but the irresponsibility of people in Third World countries who choose to place their own desire to have or at least make babies over the wretched lives they’ve doomed those babies to endure. Regards, Burt.”

So far, I’ve not heard back. But just in case those of you who haven’t yet delved into “67 Conservatives” were wondering, the eight people Hewitt would like to dine with are Jesus Christ, Julius Caesar, Augustine, Augustus, Disraeli, Churchill, Washington and Lincoln.

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