In the words of an old tune introduced by Doris Day in “The Man Who Knew Too Much,” what will be, will be. I am writing this three days before the mid-term elections. The polls suggest that the GOP will wrest control of the Senate from Harry Reid’s sweaty grasp, but they also indicate that in several races, the Democrat is running 10-15% ahead of Obama’s approval numbers. If you were ever in doubt, this alone should convince you that millions of our fellow citizens are fatheads.

I mean, when Obama’s approval numbers range between 30 and 40%, when 60% of the nation believe America is going to hell in a hand basket, and, yet, those who have voted for Obama’s policies 97% of the time still have a good chance of being re-elected, contagion by Ebola is the least of our problems.

In one of my recent polls, I asked if the GOP would gain control of the Senate, and, if so, would it make any difference. A number of the Tea Party faithful thought we’d recapture the Senate, but it would make no difference at all, and took offense when I referred to them as misguided. Even though I pointed out that at the very least, Obama would finally be compelled to veto House bills and could no longer pretend the House was filled with “obstructionists,” and that he would be prevented from placing any more Kagans or Sotomayors on the Supreme Court, they still insisted it didn’t matter.

Now as you all know, I’m a live-and-let-live sort of guy. But when the Tea Party muddied the waters in Louisiana, where Bill Cassidy was trying to defeat three-term Sen. Mary Landrieu, by placing a second Republican candidate, Rob Maness, on the ballot, it merely ensured that Cassidy wouldn’t be able to avoid a runoff by receiving the necessary 50% of the vote.

In spite of Sarah Palin’s prediction that Maness would win the election, the reality is that Cassidy will be forced to run and win all over again in December. By that time, with control of the Senate possibly in the balance, the DNC will be able to flood the state with money and high-profile Democrats, including not only the Clintons and a gaggle of actors and rock stars, but will very likely manage to roll out the late Huey Long for a few meet-and-greet barbecues.

At times I’ve been asked if I’m not afraid of offending disenchanted Democrats and so-called Independents by never pulling my punches when it comes to ridiculing liberals, and even throwing the occasional jab at Tea Partiers. The answer is that I’m not even slightly fazed. I’m not a politician trolling for votes, so I can afford to be honest. I seek only to enlighten and amuse.

The reason I write so often is because I sincerely believe those on the Left are out to destroy America, to fundamentally change what, at most, required only a little tweaking. But even writing as often as I do, and covering a variety of items in each piece, I keep falling behind. What’s more, I suspect that would be the case even if I concentrated all my efforts to exposing Eric Holder, the vilest and most dangerous racist in America, and the toxic dump he has made of the Justice Department.

As for my relationship to the Tea Party, I happen to share their beliefs, just not their stubborn agenda. I wish everyone agreed with my politics and theirs, but I know that’s not the case. Therefore, I always say that philosophically, I’m a conservative. But, politically, I’m a Republican, which means I will always vote for the Republican candidate in a general election. And when, as in Louisiana, there are two Republicans on the same ballot, I will vote for the one I’m convinced is able to defeat the Democrat.

I even vote early by mail because I realize that at some point everybody dies, and I wouldn’t want to pass away just before Election Day and miss out on the chance to vote against the Democrats. In fact, the only drawback to being a Republican is that, unlike those on the Left, we don’t get to keep on voting long after we’ve been buried.

The fact is I used to be a Democrat. Having been raised in the home of Russian-Jewish immigrants, how could it have been otherwise? But thanks to Jimmy Carter, I finally came to my senses just as the Party took leave of its own.

We’ve gone from being a nation of, by and for the people, to one that is of, by and for, the political hacks and their multitude of hand maidens contaminating the federal bureaucracy. In particular, the folks at the EPA and the IRS would have been right at home in the old Soviet Union, dancing to Stalin’s tune.

If I had been running a GOP Senate race, I would have produced a TV ad in which the Democrat’s face would have morphed into that of Harry Reid, and then into Obama’s mug, before reverting to his own. For as Obama said on two separate occasions, no matter how much space Senate Democrats tried to put between themselves and the President, his policies were on every ballot.

Recently, Hillary Clinton told a cheering crowd of liberal dolts that “companies and corporations don’t create jobs.” And because her staff is apparently as dumb and as lazy as the slackers who comprise her base, it took them three days to get around to explaining she didn’t really mean what she said.

It’s bad enough that Mrs. Clinton made such an utterly stupid remark, but it must have been particularly galling to the folks at NBC after they’d gone to the trouble of creating a $600,000-a-year job specifically for Chelsea.

It is now three days later. It’s Election Night and I can not only breathe more easily, but my unlikeliest fantasies have been exceeded. The GOP has gained control of the Senate, no matter what happens in Virginia and Alaska, and Harry Reid, like one of Cinderella’s coachman as the clock struck midnight, has been transformed back into a mouse with a rotten personality.

The GOP has apparently picked up a dozen seats in the House and have even added to their governorships, not only defeating Charley Crist in Florida, but Jimmy Carter’s grandson in Georgia.

But, perhaps most satisfying of all, they unseated the incumbent governor in Illinois, in spite of both Obamas campaigning for Pat Quinn, and the Republicans won in Arkansas, although both Clintons figured their charisma alone could carry Mike Beebe across the finish line.

As the Clintons and the Obamas have shown repeatedly in the past, their coattails are even shorter than those of Batman’s arch nemesis, the umbrella-wielding Penguin.