Upright: “Remember, every Democrat running for president wants you just as disarmed and defenseless as the Venezuelan people are in the face of their socialist masters. Obey the Founders. Buy guns and ammunition.” —Kurt Schlichter

Non compos mentis: “Do you know how many times the word ‘Woman’ is mentioned in the Constitution? Zero. That is unacceptable. Women must be equally represented and equally protected.” —Rep. Eric Swalwell (Spoiler alert: You also won’t stumble across the word “Man.”)

The BIG Lie: “The truth is that Medicare today is the most popular health insurance program in the country, and all we are doing is expanding it to cover all people, and when we do that, we do something that many private insurance policies don’t allow. We give you freedom of choice.” —Sen. Bernie Sanders

And why do you think that is? “The Democrats’ problem, I think, has been their failure to actually provide results in people’s lives.” —New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo


Tone-deaf: “Make America moral again. Make America — you know, return to the essence of who we are, the dignity of the country, the dignity of people, treating our people with dignity.” —Joe Biden

Dezinformatsiya: “If you don’t take umbrage with the president of the United States misleading you, the attorney general of the United States misleading you — lying, both of them — then what are you gonna take issue with? What are you gonna have a problem with? When you’re supposed to be the party of the rule of law, when you have a president and the attorney general who are not fighting for the rule of law but who are carrying the water for indecent and inappropriate and possibly even unlawful behavior, what is gonna upset you?” —CNN’s Don Lemon

Braying Jackass: “Not only did [William Barr] write a four-page summary that misled the American people, he was then told by Robert Mueller that he misled the American people, then he lies in front of Congress, and then he does a press conference misleading the American people again. It is incredible the actions he took. He absolutely needs to go, and then he can apply to be White House press secretary where he can lie all he wants.” —Rep. Ted Lieu

And last… “Dems can’t fund a $5 billion wall, but can spend $2 trillion naming roads after themselves.” —Erick Erickson