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Wednesday Chronicle

Chronicle

Sep. 5, 2001

THE FOUNDATION

“The law…dictated by God Himself is, of course, superior in obligation to any other. It is binding over all the globe, in all countries, and at all times. No human laws are of any validity if contrary to this.” –Alexander Hamilton

INSIGHT

“A state is nothing more than a reflection of its citizens; the more decent the citizens, the more decent the state.” –Ronald Reagan

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.” –Mark Twain

“Beware the tyranny of the minority.” –Latin Proverb

“Prayer enlarges the heart until it is capable of containing God’s gift of himself.” –Mother Teresa

“Faith is seeing the invisible, but not the nonexistent.” –A.W. Tozer

“The problem is not that the churches are filled with empty pews, but that the pews are filled with empty people.” –Charlie Shedd

“For the cause of peace, the United States is adopting the only practicable principles that have ever been proposed, of preparation, limitation and renunciation.” –Calvin Coolidge

“It is hard to fail; but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.” –Theodore Roosevelt

“How often we look upon God as our last and feeblest resource! We go to Him because we have nowhere else to go. And then we learn that the storms of life have driven us, not upon the rocks, but into the desired haven.” –George MacDonald

“None can become fit for the future life, who hath not practiced himself for it now.” –St. Augustine

“I have held many things in my hands, and I have lost them all; but whatever I have placed in God’s hands, that I still possess.” –Corrie Ten Boom

“The mark of a saint is not perfection, but consecration. A saint is not a man without faults, but a man who has given himself without reserve to God.” –W. T. Richardson

“The most important human endeavor is striving for morality in our actions. Our inner balance and even our very existence depends on it. Only morality in our actions can give beauty and dignity to our lives.” –Albert Einstein

UPRIGHT

“The government’s chief function is extorting money from us and giving it to others. It has the power to do with impunity what private persons would go to prison for doing. It is, literally, organized crime.” –Joseph Sobran

“Politics is the other form of warfare that sometimes rests on dividing and conquering. Liberals are two-faced enough to pretend they never participate when, in fact, it’s so often their very signature.” –Brent Bozell

“Negotiations are the bane of the West. Nothing will shake our faith in the delusion that we can settle our differences with totalitarians, tyrants and thugs at the conference table.” –Don Feder

“Leadership requires ignoring the easy route and doing what is right.” –Glynn Custred & James Stockdale

“If we allow minor things such as paper and pencils to be lifted from us with meager resistance, there’s no telling what the enemies of freedom might demand of us when they return tomorrow.” –Frederick B. Meekins

“Good stewardship of nature is important, but human lives come first.” –John Nowacki

“When equal protection is lost, it will be lost for everyone.” –Paul Craig Roberts

“Today we keep labor in its place by onerous taxes and stifling regulation – and by offering the poor a sham of an education in isolated schools that are protected from competition and accountability.” –Paul Greenberg

“Before we pony up more cash for the UN’s dubious utopian schemes, President Bush ought to explain to Kofi Annan and his colleagues that We the People want more of our people looking after how all that money is spent. It’s time for a subtle reminder that we have rebelled before over ‘Taxation Without Representation’.” –Oliver North

“Our culture of victimology works oddly, as you may have noticed. We care about victims all right – those afflicted with this disadvantage or that one: women, ethnic minorities, the disabled. The list is long. The oddity is in the omissions. Murder victims seem to excite less compassion than do their murderers.” –Bill Murchison

“Liberal Democrats seem to be guided by a worldview that sees man as perfectible and government as the primary change-agent. They rarely confront a problem for which they don’t envision a government solution.” –David Limbaugh

“Humanitarians with armies are dangerous things.” –David Dieteman

“Every nation’s future is only as reliable as its military.” –Ross Mackenzie

“When the State censors, it trespasses upon the mind and coerces conviction. Censorship is therefore a form of aggression, and aggression isn’t conducive to peace.” –Myles Kantor

“Ignoring or downplaying black achievement promotes the victim attitude, where people believe that in order for them to be successful somebody else must perform some benevolent act.” –Walter Williams

“…[H]ow short the distance from ridiculous to mainstream has become.” –Charles Colson

“The Democratic leadership in the Senate believes that God should be killed. Short of this, however, they are willing to erase him from our public space.” –Armstrong Williams

EDITORIAL EXEGESIS

“When participants at a UN racism conference are ready to leave prejudices at the door and address subjects that challenge politically correct biases, the United States might consider attending. Unfortunately, that day is not likely to come any time soon.” –Washington Times

DEZINFORMATSIA

“What really sets Jesse Helms apart is that he is the last prominent unabashed white racist politician in this country.” –Washington Post columnist David Broder under the title “Jesse Helms, White Racist.” **No, Jesse Helms is the most unabashed constitutional constructionist and anti-Communist in the U.S. Senate – and that’s what Leftmedia darlings like Broder really choke on!

This week’s “Leftmedia Buster” Award: “Among editors and reporters of the national media – papers, magazines, TV – a ‘liberal bias’ is not so much denied as ignored, despite overwhelming evidence that it exists.” –Robert J. Samuelson in a column appearing on the same page as David Broder’s above calumny.

“Would you describe your political beliefs as conservative, moderate or liberal?” –Survey question put to 301 “media professionals, including reporters and editors from top newspapers, TV and radio networks, news services and news magazines”; only 6% indicated “conservative,” while the rest termed themselves either “moderate” or “liberal.” **We are shocked – SHOCKED!

“That’s a lot of hokum…. There is no liberal bias in the press in the whole. In fact, if there is a bias, it’s on the other side.” –Time magazine’s Jack White

LEFTOVERS

“Progressive leadership is in a deep crisis at the moment in the Democratic Party and outside.” –Al Sharpton **Who we think qualifies under the category “outside.”

“No one gets to stay forever. And it’s better to leave when someone wants you.” –Bill Clinton to a Chappaqua neighbor who told him she wished he could still be president. **Perhaps she meant to imply that he would, thus, not be her neighbor!

“There’s some pretty foolish ostracism going on.” –Ralph Nader on the fact he can’t get an audience with any Demos, who accuse him of stealing votes from Al Gore and throwing the presidential election to Bush. **Memo to W: Take Ralph to lunch!

VILLAGE IDIOTS

This week’s “Village Glitterati” Award: “I’m very, very concerned about the Bush presidency. I’m worried about the kind of cuts he might make in domestic programs that mean something to a lot of people, including people in my family who depend on certain things from the government.” –Actress Sarah Jessica Parker

“Cows are people, too, and drinking their milk is a denigration of their creaturehood.” –PETA

“A Swedish politician’s remark that pigs are as intelligent as mentally retarded children has led to a storm of criticism in the country. But Zaida Catalan, spokeswoman of the opposition Green Party’s youth organization, defended the remarks she made…saying she wanted to draw attention to the suffering of animals…. ‘This is not about degrading mentally handicapped people, it’s about upgrading animals to the level of humans’.” –Reuters

From the “Village Academic Curriculum” File: At Villanova University, an entire run of a conservative student publication was stolen by administrators, who explained their action “concerned content.” A feature in the paper exposed the exclusive banking connection between Villanova, a Catholic university, and First Union, a bank that supports pro-abortion causes.

SHORT CUTS

“Something is clearly wrong when you begin to feel nostalgic for Warren Christopher.” –John O'Sullivan

“At one time, there were more guns than lawyers in this country. Now look at the mess we are in.” –Dick Boland

“It’s one of life’s little pleasures – using the mute button on a talk show.” –Bob Thaves in the comic strip “Frank & Ernest”

“It’s okay for the Irish of Notre Dame, the Trojans of USC, the Spartans of Michigan State and San Jose State, to have names that identify them with ethnic groups. But somehow it’s demeaning to Indians. Where will it end? Not, I suppose, until we change the names of Indiana and Indianapolis, Sioux City and Sioux Falls, the Mohawk Valley, the Navajo Trail, Redman chewing tobacco and Pontiac automobiles.” –Lyn Nofziger

“Clinton’s like one of those 1-900 phone sex lines: he has no area code; he’s from everywhere and nowhere.” –Mark Steyn

“So the Army has begun issuing every Army person a black beret, long the exclusive possession of Army Rangers (the Rangers have switched to berets of tan). It’s sort of like giving every boxer a championship belt. A wag wonders whether members of the New Army, thus attired, will wear the beret for doing or merely being.” –Ross Mackenzie

“Can there be a worse idea than ‘Jurassic Park III’? How’s this: You never thought it would resurface. It did. ‘Titanic 2: The Resurrection.’ Sequels are discouraging, but inevitable.” –Tony Kornheiser

“Now, Kustom Cars as understood in California have little to do with cars, and nothing to do with transportation. They are a form of automotive sculpture, having vast supercharged engines that won’t start because the gas tank has been removed to make room for a refrigerator. Sometimes they won’t even roll: The wheels, dismounted so the car will sit rakishly lower, rest beside it on satin cushions.” –Fred Reed

“In my humble opinion, Democrats are devoid of character, which is what gives them their natural immunity to scandal. In my humble opinion, the Vichy government is alive and well inside the United States Senate. It is time to dissolve that absurd body and make the chamber into a respectable broom closet. In my humble opinion, because of his willingness to show up anywhere, anytime, for money, Bill Clinton will go into the history books as the Pay-Per-View President.” –Norman Liebmann

Night Lines:

Jay Leno…. (reruns) How about some Hannibal jokes?! Do you know what Hannibal’s greatest regret is? Not having a Dean Martin celebrity roast! Do you know what Hannibal calls Michael Jackson? The other white meat! Do you know what Hannibal calls a supermodel from Wisconsin? A quarter-pounder with cheese! Why doesn’t Hannibal eat Californians? Too many artificial ingredients.

David Letterman…. Have you seen the new Al Gore? He has a beard. He’s going for the rabbi look, to help him out in Florida the next time around. …. For Labor Day weekend I have my new Gary Condit barbecue apron. It says, “I’ve been married for 39 years, I’ve made some mistakes, I’m not a perfect man.” …. Gary Condit had a barbecue [Labor Day] then the cops spent two hours grilling him. …. Tonight is our eighth anniversary of being here on CBS! (applause) Wow, eight years – that makes us the longest-running disappointment on Broadway! When this show came on eight years ago, Dick Cheney was only on his third heart attack. Eight years ago Gary Condit’s hair style was in! …. Bill Clinton is in Rio de Janeiro. Did you see the picture on the TV? He was in shorts on the beach. He’s not out building homes for the homeless – he’s getting around like he won the Powerball!

Argus Hamilton…. The UN Conference on Racism struggled Sunday to prescribe the correct remedy for alleged Zionist oppression as well as African slavery. After two days, they came up with a compromise. They’ve decided to ask the Jews to rebuild the Pyramids. …. Janet Reno will announce for the Florida governorship today. The Elian Gonzalez thing may work in her favor. Ever since Danny Almonte knocked Florida out of the Little League World Series, Janet Reno has looked like a woman whose time has come. …. Cuba said Elian Gonzalez won’t accompany Fidel Castro to the United Nations children’s assembly in New York. It’s a new policy. No Hispanic children are allowed in New York City without a notarized birth certificate and a 75 mph fastball. …. The Washington Post says Maryland Governor Glendening is having an affair with Gennifer Crawford. His ambition is transparent. Whenever a Democratic governor wants to get elected president, step one is to start seeing a Gennifer on the side. …. Bill Clinton gave a paid speech in Brazil Friday to professors and students at a collegiate foundation in Sao Paulo. He praised Brazil for its diversity. That’s the nicest possible way you can acknowledge the Nazi fugitives in the crowd. …. Plymouth is preparing for the 380th anniversary of the first Thanksgiving in 1621. These colonists were Puritans who placed sinners on display in the public square to humiliate them. Today, we place them on the House Intelligence Committee.

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