The Patriot Post® · 8 More Historical Events Tim Walz Has Claimed to Be At

By The Babylon Bee ·
https://patriotpost.us/opinion/110803-8-more-historical-events-tim-walz-has-claimed-to-be-at-2024-10-04

By now you’ve heard that Tim Walz literally stood in front of a tank in Tiananmen Square, but that’s not the only iconic moment the governor has been present for! Here are eight other historical events Walz has claimed to be at:

  1. Landing on the moon with the crew of Apollo 11: One small step for Tim, one giant leap for Tim-kind.

  2. Raising the flag on Iwo Jima: Walz singlehandedly held off three thousand Japanese troops (while wounded!) just to plant Old Glory.

  3. Marching in Selma with Joe Biden: It was there he first met Kamala, still in her stroller shouting, “Fweedom!”

  4. The fall of Troy: In fact, it was none other than Tim Walz who shot the arrow that pierced Achilles’ heel.

  5. Aboard United Flight 93 on September 11th: Walz bravely stormed the cockpit, sacrificing his life for others. Hero.

  6. The Last Supper: According to Walz, he suspected Judas the whole time.

  7. When the One Ring was cast into the fires of Mount Doom: Tim can’t carry it for you, but he can carry you!

  8. The burning of Minneapolis in 2020: Okay, this one checks out.

Wow, what an incredible life! Truly, no one can compare to the storied journey of one Timothy J. Walz.

From our friends at The Babylon Bee.