The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store

By Argus Hamilton ·
https://patriotpost.us/opinion/15053-from-the-comedy-store-2012-10-13

Barack Obama’s debate with Mitt Romney fell on his twentieth wedding anniversary. It confused him. During the debate he told Michelle her tax cuts will explode the deficit, then he told Mitt Romney the day they met was the most beautiful day of his life.

President Obama lashed out at Mitt Romney’s Denver debate performance when he spoke at an outdoor rally. The president looked one hundred percent better. That trial separation from his Teleprompter was the toughest twenty-four hours of his life.

Al Gore scored the debate and blamed Barack Obama’s poor performance on Denver’s altitude. The president didn’t think the altitude would be much of a problem. Back when he was in college he got some of his best test scores while he was high.

Joe Biden cheerfully admitted that Democrats plan to raise a trillion dollars in new taxes. A day earlier he said the middle class has been buried the last four years. Last night President Obama phoned Mitt Romney and asked Mitt if he would fire Joe Biden.

President Obama trained for the debate this week at Colonial Williamsburg. This is where they re-enact pre-revolutionary America. The last time Obama went to Colonial Williamsburg his white half sold his black half, and a week later he saved Bank of America.

Columbus Day was celebrated with a parade in New York City Monday where Italian-Americans held pride marches. The explorer landed in the Bahamas while looking for India. Before the telephone was invented this is what people had to do to find tech support.

Arnold Schwarzenegger admitted he praised Hitler while he filmed his weightlifting movie Pumping Iron decades ago. It implies that steroids can make you a Nazi. It’s just more evidence of why Lance Armstrong was able to roll through France in twelve days.

President Obama vowed to work with Republicans to solve the country’s problems if he’s given a second term. It’s not a reflexive action. He said compromise has become a dirty word in Washington and then he told the Republicans to go compromise themselves.

Michelle Obama said if she were a producer she’d cast Denzel Washington to play her husband. That’s perfect. Denzel Washington played a submarine commander in another movie and he knows what it’s like to be sixteen trillion feet underwater.

President Obama hosted fundraisers in Beverly Hills and Hollywood. He’s always thinking. Just when he starts losing the race he slips into L.A. to negotiate the best possible deal for his post-presidential reality show, Keeping Up with the Communists.

The Congress on Human Trafficking, Prostitution and Sex Work was scheduled next month at Pennsylvania University. The William J. Clinton Foundation is the event’s sponsor. It’s more evidence that if you do what you love, you never work a day in your life.

President Obama returned to the campaign trail after a three-day weekend of fundraising in California. There are signs his popularity is slipping out here. While he was in Los Angeles President Obama went for a walk on the beach and the tide went out.

The Wall Street Journal disputed the accuracy of last week’s improving employment numbers. It’s the government’s top priority. Barack Obama is determined to help the unemployed because it’s looking increasingly likely a month from now he’ll be one of them.

© Copyright 2012 Argus Hamilton