The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store

By Argus Hamilton ·
https://patriotpost.us/opinion/19687-from-the-comedy-store-2013-08-24

Egypt spiraled out of control as Muslim Brotherhood rioters sacked Coptic Christian churches and looted stores. This time the White House didn’t blame it on an ant- Muslim video. This uprising has Muslim outrage over a rodeo clown written all over it.

President Obama was urged by U.S. senators to take action in Egypt. One choice leads to a miltary dictatorship and the liquidation of all opposition while the other choice leads to Islamic rule and the liquidation of all infidels. May we choose wisely.

President Obama refused to take sides in Egypt’s turmoil, calling for each side to stop the violence. Things are spiraling out of control. The Mideast is teetering, NSA surveillance is being uncovered, and Hillary is trailing a rodeo clown by ten points in Iowa.

Joe Biden set up a presidential campaign organization for a White House run in three years. Raising hundreds of millions of dollars in donations will be easy for the vice president. Americans have always felt that a great comedian is worth every penny.

Cairo erupted in pitched battles between the Army and the Muslim Brotherhood. Many middle class Egyptians are revolting because in their system the poor get handouts and the rich get bailouts. Thank God that could never happen in the United States.

Egyptian television reported President Obama’s half brother Malik Obama in Kenya directs financial investments for the Muslim Brotherhood. It’s big news. If the ability to direct an economy runs in the family, Israel will win the next war before a shot is fired.

Fort Hood shooter Major Nidal Hasan told his court-martial trial he murdered thirteen U.S. servicemen to protect the Taliban. He still has the liberties of an American. Thanks to deregulation, if Hasan gets the death penalty he gets to choose his own electric company.

NSA fugitive Ed Snowden’s father flew to Moscow to try to bring his son home to the U.S. It wouldn’t affect U.S. policy. President Obama ordered greater oversight of the NSA surveillance program, which means the drones will be flying a hundred feet higher.

Pakistan began building an amusement park and a zoo in the town of Abbotobad where the Osama bin Laden raid took place. The habitats suit the environment. They are building a world class zoo, but you won’t be able to see the seals until it’s too late.

The Department of Education vowed to improve student test scores in public schools, which fell last year. Nothing reflects a country’s prestige like the quality of its public education. The national language of the United States is now third-grade English.

Eliot Spitzer led all polls for New York City comptroller but Anthony Weiner’s campaign faltered. The city appreciates effort. Eliot Spitzer rents hotel suites and pays a call girl four thousand dollars to commit adultery while Anthony Weiner just phones it in.

The Washington Post reported that the NSA is monitoring private phone calls in the U.S. It sent a chill through the capital. Who wants to be overheard in Washington where nine out of ten telephone calls boil down to when can you pay me or what are you wearing?

The White House released video of the First Family’s new dog Sunny. She will undergo the usual training. Sunny will stay in the White House Press Room until sitting up and begging and rolling over and humping the president’s leg are second nature.

© Copyright 2013 Argus Hamilton