The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store
Germany’s Chancellor Angela Merkel blasted the U.S. government for using the NSA to datamine her telephone calls. The NSA protest has spread throughout Europe. The next day Belgium, the Netherlands, Italy and France joined Germany, which is certainly a switch.
An Atlanta Falcons cheerleader made it into the Guinness Book of World Records last week when she performed forty-four consecutive back hand-springs. It wasn’t at the football game. She was celebrating finally getting a response from the ObamaCare website.
President Obama spoke with the kids at Brooklyn’s Pathways in Technology high-tech school. They had a very productive exchange. President Obama taught the children a lesson in civics, and the children taught the president how to set up a website that works.
The FBI arrested a twenty-five-year-old New York man for joining al-Qaeda through al-Qaeda’s website. In just a few clicks he was on his way to Yemen for training. How embarrassing is it that it’s easier to join al-Qaeda online than it is to enroll in ObamaCare?
Congress heard testimony from ObamaCare contractors. They said they saw there would be problems. It’s only a matter of time before we give up and call India and they tell us to un-plug the website for five minutes, plug it back in, and see if that helps.
The White House admitted that President Obama’s promise that you will get to keep your doctor under ObamaCare may not be true. Credibility is low. Last week President Obama told schoolkids his favorite food is broccoli, and they believed him, and then he told them that ObamaCare will reduce the deficit, and they burst out laughing.
The White House warned the Internet has sprouted over seven hundred fake ObamaCare websites. It’s great news. Now if everybody will just purchase a fake policy from the fake website we’ll have the same thing President Obama has, plausible deniability.
The Labor Department said that U.S. worker productivity remains stagnant. There is malaise in the air. Thirty percent of Americans polled say they’ve called in sick when they weren’t, while the other seventy percent are waiting for ObamaCare to make it legal.
Dr. Conrad Murray was released from prison in California after serving two years for accidentally killing Michael Jackson with an overdose of propofol. He said that he wants to meet privately with each member of the Jackson family. It might help them sleep better.
Dr. Conrad Murray was released from prison in California after serving two years for accidentally killing Michael Jackson with sleep drug medications. He said he expects to get his medical license back within the month. And you thought ObamaCare was a mess before.
President Obama said he didn’t know the NSA spied on allies. He also said he didn’t know of ObamaCare problems, IRS targeting and what caused Benghazi. It won’t work, there is not a person in America who’s going to believe Joe Biden is the mastermind.
The White House was attacked by Democrats and Republicans over the ObamaCare website chaos. The administration is also getting clobbered over NSA spying. President Obama just called Hillary Clinton and asked if she wouldn’t mind starting early.
The U.S. Capitol started undergoing a sixty million dollar renovation to refurbish the Capitol Dome. They deserve a good cover. Forbes magazine said there are two hundred and forty-nine millionaires serving in the U.S. Congress, so you see, crime does pay.
© Copyright 2013 Argus Hamilton