From The Comedy Store - The Patriot Post

The Washington Post ripped President Obama for making laws by executive orders without Congress. It’s perfectly legal. Law professors say his executive orders are unconstitutional but it’s not true; he just issued an executive order making them constitutional.

Senate Democrats up for re-election this fall asked President Obama to stay away and not to campaign for them. Everything is spinnable. The White House won’t say that President Obama’s popularity is plummeting, they prefer to say he just won the gold in the Men’s Downhill.

President Obama met up with Jordan’s King Abdullah in Rancho Mirage. They had a tutorial . Obama wanted to learn from the king how to advance the Mideast peace process and the king wanted to learn from Obama how to run an out-of-control population by executive order.

Afghanistan’s Hamid Karzai infuriated the U.S. for releasing terrorists from prison. He stole millions in U.S. aid, he runs heroin, and he frees terrorists to attack U.S. soldiers. We could bomb Afghanistan back into the Stone Age, but what would that set them back, fifteen minutes?

A massive snowstorm hit the Eastern Seaboard last week, burying Washington D.C. in snow. They actually hired convicted criminals to shovel the snow outside the U.S. Capitol. It’s nice to see members of Congress doing something useful for a change.

Last week’s Arctic winter snow and ice storm knocked down power lines like bowling pins all over Georgia. Thousands of people haven’t had any electricity for almost a week. It’s as if President Obama has taken over the power company.

Obama played golf on Presidents Day for the third straight day Monday as he tried to improve his game in the California sunshine. It’s difficult for the president not to bring his job with him onto the golf course. After three days, he was seventeen trillion over par.

Obama was urged by Chicago power brokers to locate his presidential library in the state of Illinois. The political atmosphere is colorful. Illinois is the only state whose present governor rides around in a car whose license plate was made by the previous governor.

Nancy Pelosi declared the Founding Fathers would have supported Obamacare mandates. She’s represented San Francisco too long. Just because the Founders wore powdered wigs, tight satin breeches and buckled high-heeled shoes doesn’t mean they went on mandates.

USA Today reports a nationwide circus clown shortage with so many old clowns retiring and few new clowns to replace the old clowns. It’s the competition. When you compare pay, job security and benefits, it’s easy to see why we are losing some of our best clowns to Congress.

Obama lectured Ukraine’s government on the rights of the Ukraine protestors. The president had the full support of Capitol Hill. To get the U.S. Congress to back the protestors against the government, he told them that the government supports Obamacare.

Obama urged Ukraine to respect the right of citizens to protest Wednesday and obey the will of the people. He said he’d have to consult Congress before taking any further action. And should that work, we might even consider bringing back the rest of the Constitution.

House Republicans moved to sue the president for enacting the Dream Act by executive order and not by a vote of Congress. It gives college scholarships to children of illegal aliens and it slaps a ten percent tax on all tanning booth sessions. Leave it to Democrats to subsidize brown people who want to be Americans and tax the Americans who want to be browner people.

The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store