From The Comedy Store - The Patriot Post

President Obama this week appeared on an online comedy show hosted by Zack Galifianakis which is called Between Two Ferns. Celebrities love to get together to use each other. President Obama was there to plug his online comedy show which is called Obamacare.

President Obama did a Funny or Die mock interview with Zack Galifianakis to lure nineteen thousand Millenials to the Obamacare website. He has to hustle to get enough young people enrolled. Tonight, he’s flying to Atlanta to egg houses with Justin Bieber.

The White House changed Obamacare again to exempt current health care plan holders for three more years. ObamaCare was passed by Congress intending to provide health care for every American. After thirty-eight changes since it became law, it is now a dam in Idaho.

North Korea held national elections on Sunday and Kim Jung Un was re-elected president, getting one hundred percent of the vote. They had a one hundred percent voter turnout. In celebration, Kim Jung Un was promoted to North Korea’s highest military rank, five-foot-two.

Russian troops seized a hospital and a missile base in Crimea, ratcheting up the tensions with Ukraine over control of the peninsula. The U.S. is not powerless to help. If we can get Chris Christie to take off his shirt and ride a horse perhaps we can scare Vladimir Putin out of Crimea.

The Senate held an all-night marathon so Democrats could declare their concern about global warming. Gridlock is grand. The GOP House is thinking of making baseball’s opening day a national holiday, which is the closest they get this year to immigration reform.

President Obama’s approval rating fell to thirty-eight percent in a Fox News poll while Toronto Mayor Rob Ford’s approval rating rose to fifty-two percent. It’s just insane. Barack Obama can’t believe he’d have been better off smoking crack than passing Obamacare.

House Republicans drew up a bill asking President Obama to drop the mandatory clause out of Obamacare. Here’s how Republicans can sell it to him, They tell the president that he can go on TV and assure the American people that if they like their complete lack of coverage, they can keep their complete lack of coverage, and it will never come back to bite him.

True Detective’s season finale starring Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson on HBO was its most-watched show ever. So many people tried to watch online that HBO’s web site crashed. President Obama scheduled network time the next day and apologized out of habit.

NSA whistleblower Ed Snowden charged the U.S. with violating free speech and disrespecting the privacy rights of citizens via webcast to SXSW from Moscow. It’s hard to argue with him. There’s no better place to celebrate free speech, privacy and respecting the rights of others than Russia.

President Obama invited Ireland’s prime minister to dine at the White House to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day. The president claims to be Irish on his mother’s side and Kenyan on his father’s side. That means he could win a drinking marathon in two hours and six minutes.

Kansas lawmaker Gail Finney proposed a bill letting Kansas schools spank kids. Nothing works on those deemed incorrigible. Research shows yelling at them has the same negative effect as spanking them, and even worse they stop listening and grow up to be U.S. congressmen.

The NFL owners meeting next week will consider the use of facial recognition technology for security at stadium entrances. Facial recognition technology is used by casinos in Las Vegas to keep out cheaters and thieves. If they used it at the U.S. Capitol we’d never get a quorum.

The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store