The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store

By Argus Hamilton ·
https://patriotpost.us/opinion/25194-from-the-comedy-store-2014-04-26

Obama’s tax return says his income fell a hundred fifty thousand dollars last year. He made three hundred grand less than the year before that. While other politicians just talk about economic decline under this administration, President Obama leads by example.

IRS supervisor Lois Lerner’s emails revealed that she coordinated audits on conservative groups with the Justice Department. Tea Party groups were audited just for opposing the president. That’s what they get for being a bunch of nuts who don’t trust the U.S. government.

The Boston Marathon drew a record-crowd of flag-waving Americans to Boyleston Street to cheer the finish of the twenty-six mile race Monday. For the first time in years, an American won the race. Kenya joined Ethiopia in filing a formal protest with the United Nations.

Chelsea Clinton thrilled Bill and Hillary Clinton with the news that she and her husband are expecting a baby this fall. The family couldn’t be any happier. No one knows if it’s going to be a boy or a girl, but it’s already leading the polls in the 2056 presidential race.

The Supreme Court ruled Monday that voters can eliminate affirmative action programs. For years, blacks, women and Hispanics had an edge. However the tide recently turned in favor of white males when they figured out that at any given moment they can discover they are gay.

The NSA was reported compiling a huge list of Americans who can be identified by facial recognition software. It’s alarming. They used facial recognition at the Super Bowl to keep criminals from entering the stadium and they were lucky to end up with two teams on the field.

The National Mall in Washington held an Earth Day rally Tuesday. It’s a day to denounce the energy required for you to stay warm, work and travel. It’s become clear that if you’re a really dedicated environmentalist, the best thing you can do for this planet is to kill yourself.

Obama traveled to Japan, South Korea, Malaysia and the Philippines this week to celebrate the economic successes of America’s allies in Asia. That’s the way it works. If President Obama wants to celebrate an economic success, he actually has to leave the country.

Vladimir Putin added Russian troops to the Ukraine border and built up Russian forces near the Baltic states and Byelorussia. Americans took notice. Warren Buffett is now offering one billion dollars to whoever guesses all the nations Vladimir Putin invades correctly.

Joe Biden in Kiev vowed that the U.S. will never recognize the Russian annexation of Crimea and will always stand for a united and undivided Ukraine. Biden was there giving advice on how to avoid going to war with Russia. In other words we’re going to war with Russia.

Joe Biden made every effort to raise his profile during his visit to Ukraine. There has been a lot of speculation, but now it’s becoming clear that he will run for president. In an effort to appear more presidential today, Joe Biden launched a website that doesn’t work.

Obama went on TV Thursday and told Americans the debate about Obamacare is over. He declared Obamacare is a resounding success and it’s time to move on. Whenever Holy Week arrives, it’s a national tradition for Americans to watch The Greatest Story Ever Told.

Rush Limbaugh had ear surgery in Los Angeles, three years after undergoing heart surgery. The media was nice to him for a day. Fox News sent a bouquet of flowers to his hospital room and MSNBC sent him a double chili-cheeseburger plus an order of steak fries.

© Copyright 2014 Argus Hamilton