The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store

By Argus Hamilton ·
https://patriotpost.us/opinion/26389-from-the-comedy-store-2014-06-07

Gwyneth Paltrow ignited a storm by likening her problems as a movie star to the life of a soldier in war. The two jobs have one big difference. If you’re fighting in Afghanistan and you need to take the day off, the director of the Taliban doesn’t agree to shoot around you.

Obama held a meeting on sports concussions with young athletes and parents in the White House East Room. He wants to do everything he can to protect young people from life-threatening injuries. He’s putting them on the waiting list to be seen by the VA.

Jay Carney resigned as White House Press Secretary. For three years he defended Obama through the IRS, NSA, AP spying, Benghazi, and VA scandals plus the Obamacare rollout. Jay Carney is leaving to take a less stressful job – defusing nuclear bombs in New Mexico.

Obama accepted the resignation of his press secretary two hours after his VA secretary resigned as hearings loomed on the Benghazi scandal and the IRS targeting of conservatives. It is not looking good for the president. Today his teleprompter took the Fifth.

UCLA announced Jane Fonda will speak at UCLA’s commencement in June. It’s like being young again. Forty-two years ago, Jane Fonda flew to an Asian stronghold to encourage the communists to resist U.S. imperialism, so coming to UCLA should feel like old home week for Jane.

The White House proposed rules to cut greenhouse gases by thirty percent via harsh new penalties on coal. It’ll cause heat and air conditioning and light bills to soar. Survivor on CBS should get record-high TV ratings this fall just from the number of Americans taking notes.

Obama announced the U.S. traded five Taliban prisoners held in Guantanamo for one American who is held captive by the Taliban Saturday. That’s the U.S. government in a nutshell. We can’t even effect a prisoner swap without running up an eighty percent deficit.

Obama defended his trading five Taliban commanders for Bowe Bergdahl Monday despite his AWOL status. It looks bad. Whatever danger Bergdahl was in with the Taliban can’t be any worse that the danger he faces when he returns – a trip to a VA Hospital.

Obama’s decision to trade five terrorist commanders to the Taliban for one U.S. deserter drew huge blowback against him in Congress and in the press. The trade was so bad there can be only one rational explanation. He thinks he’s the President of the Chicago Cubs.

Hillary Clinton gave an interview to People magazine to promote her book Hard Choices. In the interview Hillary said she’s moved on from Bill’s affair with Monica Lewinsky. However she left open the possibility of swapping him for five prisoners from Guantanamo Bay.

Politico reported that President Obama plans to move to New York after he leaves office despite his ties to Chicago. It’s for practical reasons. He wants to office a global foundation like Bill Clinton did, and besides, the Secret Service would be outgunned in Chicago.

Rio de Janeiro declared itself ready to host the World Cup soccer matches slated to begin next Thursday. The national teams are now arriving in Rio and reviewing strategy. The Russian team knows what it’s got to do to avoid elimination, be very nice to Vladimir Putin.

Justin Bieber apologized Monday for telling a racist joke on video three years ago which featured the repeated use of racist language. He can expect the same punishment Donald Sterling received. Any day now, a white guy is going to drop by and give him two billion dollars.

© Copyright 2014 Argus Hamilton