The Patriot Post® · Guess Which ABC Show Will Feature Full Frontal Nudity?

The other day I hopped off the R Train underneath the Fox News Corner of the World and came face to face with a poster promoting ABC’s new interpretation of “The Muppets.”

There, in all his glory, was Kermit the Frog — touting an “adult” version of the beloved children’s show.

“Finally. A network tv show with full frontal nudity,” the poster read.

Technically, the advertisement is correct, seeing how Kermit doesn’t wear pants. I mean, what self-respecting frog would wear Chinos?

Still, I suspect it’s going to shock a lot of moms and dads when they discover that the family-friendly Muppets of the 1970s are no more.

“It’s sort of an adult Muppet show,” Kermit the Frog said during a promotional video for the show.

The mature version of “The Muppets” will cover a range of `topics from sex and drugs to interspecies relationships, The Daily Mail reports.

“No subject is off limits,” one show source told the newspaper. “Everyone remembers the classic Jim Henson Muppet Show of the 1970s and 1980s, but this new show is aimed firmly at a mature, modern audience and addresses subjects that would have been taboo in the past.”

One story line features Fozzie Bear involved in a relationship with a human. The woman’s father asks about what would happen if they had children.

“Where will they go to the bathroom…in the woods?” the father asks.

“That is an offensive stereotype,” Fozzie fired back.

Cue the laugh track.

In this new telling of the Muppets, Kermit and Miss Piggy have broken up and Kermit is dating a curvy new oinker named Denise.

“What can I say?” Kermit says in one promo. “I’m attracted to pigs.”

And then there’s Time magazine’s faux interview with “international celebrity” Miss Piggy, titled, “Is Monogamy Over? Breaking Up With Kermit Made Me Wonder.”

Conservative writer (and Fox News contributor) Erick Erickson reminded his readers that Miss Piggy came out as a pro-choice feminist during an MSNBC interview.

“At a time more and more parents are concerned about family oriented television, we get a puppet character loved by kids weighing in on abortion and monogamy — both to the left and on the leftwing MSNBC,” Erickson wrote.

ABC hopes children watch the show and predicted they would enjoy some of the humor. But I’m not so sure about that.

How many parents want to explain the punchline of the interspecies dating scene to their five-year-old?

However, if the adult version of “The Muppets” is successful, don’t be surprised to see the edgy side of other cartoon characters.

I could foresee a made-for-television drama about Wile E. Coyote serving hard time for the attempted murder of Road Runner. Or how about a reality series based on Daffy Ducky’s time in a mental institution?

And Lifetime should be all over the heart-pounding miniseries, “I Married a Rabbit: The Elmer Fudd Story.”

After folks have a chance to watch the first episode of these progressive and politically-charged Muppets, I suspect a lot of viewers will feel like Muppet Sam the Eagle.

Sam once uttered these prophetic words:

“Following that last piece of material, I am disassociating myself from this whole, weird, sick show.”