The Patriot Post® · Climate Change Is for Real!

I bet that title grabbed your attention. Is it possible, you’re asking yourselves, that Prelutsky has gone over to the dark side? Has he signed on to join Obama, Mrs. Clinton, Joe Biden and Al Gore, in proclaiming that in a loony bin of a world in which Iran will soon be a nuclear power, North Korea is threatening to incinerate New York, ISIS is building a caliphate populated entirely by serial killers and Vladimir Putin is counting his blessings that Barack Obama is president and not Ronald Reagan, that the weather is our single biggest worry?

No, I’m not. I’m merely acknowledging that the climate is always changing because that’s what climate does. Even here in Southern California, you will notice subtle changes every once in a while if you pay really close attention. But friends who live in other parts of the country swear that it changes four times a year, regular as clockwork. They even have names for it. They call it winter, summer, spring and, uh, something else.

It recently occurred to me that some of the people who oppose Obama’s inviting thousands of those referred to as “Syrian refugees” into the United States object on the grounds that we don’t really know who they are, that they haven’t been properly vetted. I beg to differ. These are, overwhelmingly, young men from the Middle East who happen to be Muslims. If you were looking to invite guests into the country who were out to kill you for religious reasons, these are those guys.

Moreover, they’re men who fled a war zone, leaving women and children to fend for themselves. So even by Islamic standards, they’re scumbags.

I have yet to hear a good reason to bring in more Muslims than we already have or, to put it another way, are stuck with. In 1943, I don’t recall anyone suggesting that what America really needed were a few more Nazis.

Political correctness has a lot to answer for, including the acceptance we show to able-bodied ingrates who live and breed on the tax dollars of others; the tolerance we display towards those whose idea of birth control is an abortion; the legitimizing of same-sex marriages and the special accommodations we offer to the self-proclaimed transgender freaks, including allowing them to decide which bathrooms, locker rooms and pronouns, to use.

If you live in California, you have to wonder how much longer the geniuses up in the Silicon Valley will continue to remain in the state with the highest taxes and the most foolish regulations on the books.

Once they all move to Texas and Arizona, the only tax base we’ll have left, aside from the marijuana industry, will rest entirely on Hollywood and the pornography industry. Or do I repeat myself?

Recently, Andrew Puzder, the CEO of Carl’s, Jr., gave a speech in which he said the company had opened its first fast food outlet in Siberia. He went on to say that it cost 60% less than it would in California and there was a lot less paperwork.

I guess it shouldn’t come as too big a surprise that Vladimir Putin is more receptive and responsive to capitalism than Jerry Brown and his left-wing munchkins in Sacramento.

Speaking of fast foods, some people might assume that the predictable response to a $15 minimum wage for unskilled workers would be $9 Big Macs. But nobody is going to pay that much even for that very special sauce. Instead, the places will go automated. In the end, Democrats will take bows for once again raising the minimum wage, and the displaced workers will continue voting for Democrats because they’ll be on welfare, which is mother’s milk to liberals.

Considering how much Democrats love to spend other people’s money, you’d think they’d want to encourage people to make more. But that is clearly not on their agenda. Like the goofball who killed the goose that laid the golden eggs because he assumed it must be filled with treasure, they want to get their hands on all the money they can as quickly as they can, so they can split most of it among themselves, using whatever is left over to bribe blacks, Hispanics and ignorant youngsters, into voting for them.

In some circles that is called a vicious circle; in others, it’s chapter one of Saul Alinsky’s playbook.

What happened in Flint, Michigan, should never happen in an American city. Considering the amount of money people — yes, even those living in Flint — pay in taxes, poison should not come pouring out of their faucets.

That being said, I can only pray that they have reserved a room near central heating in Hell for Hillary Clinton, who blamed the scandal on Republicans and their inherent racism.

I suppose that even someone not running for president, and therefore relying on a large turnout of black voters, might blame the Republican governor of Michigan if one believed that a governor is supposed to oversee every aspect of every municipality in the state. However, logically, it would come under the purview of the city council to oversee Flint’s water supply. After all, they’re the folks who decided to switch systems from one that worked to one that was cheaper.

Just for the record, all nine members of Flint’s City Council are Democrats and six of the weasels are black.

Although a great deal of historical doubt surrounds the belief that while Rome burned, Nero fiddled, there can be no question that Obama tangoed while Brussels burned.

Because I know that many of you enjoy the idiosyncrasies and ambiguities of English as much as I do, I have decided to share a few from a list I received.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

If a deaf child signs swear words, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Where do forest rangers go to get away from it all?

What are you supposed to do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will break in and clean them?

If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is it homeless or naked?

Why do they put braille on the drive-through bank machines?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

One nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.

If you try to fail, and you succeed, which have you done?

Why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids instead of assteroids?

Can an atheist get insurance against acts of God?

Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?

(I saved that one for last in case you needed a little extra time figuring it out.)