Right Opinion

The PC Vigilantes

Burt Prelutsky · Jan. 20, 2018

When those on the Left seek to condemn their betters — namely those of us on the Right — their very first victim is inevitably the truth.

Consider, if you will, how it is that black people never seem to ask themselves or each other why they always insist on trying to pass off bullies and criminals like Trayvon Martin, Freddie Gray and Michael Brown as choir boys and potential valedictorians, and why they are so quick to attack the police rather than the gun-packing, drug-peddling, punks who prey on them and their children?

And why is it that politicians of all stripes want to pretend that dealing drugs isn’t a violent crime and should no longer be a criminal offense? For one thing, drug abuse destroys countless lives; additionally, turf warfare is the motive behind most of the murders in places like Chicago, St. Louis, Baltimore and Atlanta.

In a related matter, why are so many people so outraged that the president referred to places like Haiti and El Salvador as “s—holes”?

Those who insist that Donald Trump was insulting Haitians are merely trying to make the case that he’s a racist. Haiti is a s—hole, and we all know it, as are many other countries in Latin America, the Caribbean and Africa. Trump wasn’t insulting everyone from those places. In fact, he was, in his own special way, acknowledging he understood why people from those countries might not want to return even after coming to America in the wake of storms and earthquakes 20 years ago.

He was being honest, whereas the woman at CNN claimed she couldn’t really decide, given the choice, whether she would prefer living in Haiti or Norway.

In my circle, that’s referred to as a Whopper with cheese, and a side of fries.

One would have to assume that on her death bed, if asked whether it would be her preference to go to Heaven or Hell, she would say: “I’m really not sure. Either place is equally fine with me. Why doesn’t someone just flip a coin?”


I have made no secret of the fact that one of the things I have against crazy Steve Bannon is that he cost the Republicans a seat in the U.S. Senate. I always thought Roy Moore was a disaster just waiting to happen, but I’ll acknowledge I will forever be in his debt because he’s the reason, the only reason, that the Democrats forced the arrogantly buffoonish Al Franken to pack his bags.

Their reasoning was that Moore, although accused of sexual misconduct, would probably win his election, and they wanted to be free to attack him and his party without allowing the Republicans the opportunity to respond by pointing at the loathsome toad from Minnesota and say: “You’re fine ones to talk!”


I haven’t always been Henry Kissinger’s biggest fan, but I have to credit him with saying several things that seem to mean more when he says them than when I do.

For instance: “Donald Trump is a phenomenon that foreign countries haven’t seen before. Liberals and all those who favored Clinton will never admit it. They will never admit that he is the one true leader. The man is doing changes like never before and does all of it for the sake of this nation’s people. After eight years of tyranny, we finally see a difference.

"Trump puts America and its people first. That is why people love him and this is why he will remain in charge for a long time. There is not a single thing wrong with him and people need to open their eyes.”

Amen.


I’m pretty old, but I still remember vividly how painful adolescence could be. Between hormones, peer pressure and the absolutely certain conviction that (even at the time, a part of you probably doubted) you were smarter than your teachers and wiser than your parents, it was, emotionally, an extremely tough time.

But it was nothing compared to what the kids are dealing with today. Back then, your circle was pretty much limited to a few dozen kids in your class or your neighborhood. You might have to find a way to deal with one or two bullies, but now, thanks to the kids living so many hours of their lives electronically, sharing their every thought and activity with strangers, they are leaving themselves vulnerable not only to sexual predators trolling for new victims but cyber bullies. It shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone that teenage suicides are spiking.

I understand that it can be next to impossible to separate the youngsters from Facebook and the various other forms of social networking, but if you don’t even try, you’re enabling your loved ones to walk blindly through the woods, where lions, tigers and bears are the very least of their worries.


Now, because I believe, like Mary Poppins, that a bit of sugar helps the medicine go down, I’ll share a little church humor: One Sunday morning, a mother went in to wake up her son and tell him it was time to get ready for church. He pulled the covers over his head, while announcing, “I’m not going.”

“Why not?”

“I’ll give you two good reasons. One, they don’t like me, and two, I don’t like them.”

His mother replied: “Well, I’ll give you two good reasons why you should go. One, you’re 59 years old, and, two, you’re the pastor.”

Moving on: A kindergarten teacher gave her class a show-and-tell assignment. Each student was told to bring in an object representing their religion. The next day, the first student stood up in front of the class and said: “My name is Benjamin. I’m Jewish and this is a Star of David.”

The second child stood up and said: “My name is Mary. I’m a Catholic and this is a rosary.”

When it was time for the third child to speak, he stood up and said: “My name is Tommy. I’m a Lutheran and this is a tuna casserole.”

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