Right Opinion

Feminists, Phooey!

Burt Prelutsky · Feb. 23, 2019

One of the many dirty little secrets of the feminist movement, aside from their reflexive defense of sexual predators and abusers like Harvey Weinstein, Keith Ellison and Bill Clinton, so long as they’re Democrats and regard Roe v. Wade as sacred text, is that they hate most women as much or more than they hate men.

That is why they never speak out against Islamic treatment of Muslim women, Planned Parenthood or Hillary Clinton, who spent decades trashing the very women her husband preyed upon.

It is the reason why they don’t even take the time to attack males who pretend to be women in order to win female athletic competitions and steal college scholarships intended for female athletes.

What I’m waiting for is the inevitable team of adults insisting they’re children so they can participate in Little League competition and walk off with the world title.

A Baltimore lesbian, Julia Beck, was kicked off an LGBT commission because she refused to refer to a convicted English rapist named David Thompson who insisted he was a woman named Karen White as “she.”

It’s worth noting that the British court system, which is apparently every bit as loony as our own, decided to take him at his word and incarcerated him in a women’s prison, where — surprise, surprise — he quickly commenced to rape two other women.

Why, I’d ask, isn’t the judge who carried out this travesty not being indicted for aiding and abetting in the two inevitable rapes?

As Ms. Beck explained her own plight: “After a months-long witch hunt, I was found guilty of ‘violence.’ My crime? Using a male pronoun to talk about a convicted male rapist who identifies himself as a transgender and prefers female pronouns. Apparently, it is more criminal for me to call a male rapist ‘he’ than it is for him to rape.”

Apparently, in certain circles in Baltimore, pronouns trump verbs, as well as commonsense.

Speaking of Baltimore, is it my imagination, but over the past few years, has it made a concerted effort to replace Detroit as the most deranged large city in America?

Joaquin Guzman, “El Chapo” to his friends and murder victims, has just been convicted of a slew of drug-related charges in a New York courthouse. That means his fortune, estimated to be $14 billion could be confiscated by the U.S. government if we can track it down.

Sen. Ted Cruz has presented a bill suggesting that the money, if recovered, go towards building a border wall. The man is making a lot more sense since he grew that beard.

Sen. Bob Menendez, who is Central Casting’s idea of a corrupt politician, as well as my own, ridiculed President Trump for daring to consider people who sneak across the border criminals, as well as those who are found guilty of driving under the influence.

Granted, compared to Menendez’s crimes, they’re probably small potatoes, but they’re criminal acts nonetheless, and it doesn’t behoove a U.S. senator to trivialize our laws. Especially not this particular senator.

After all, Menendez, the latest politician to prove that there is one set of laws for most Americans and another for elected officials, somehow managed to convince a jury that accepting bribes from a crooked donor isn’t as bad as Trump’s trying to build a wall at the border.

But not only did Menendez accept free airplane flights and hotel suites from his deep-pocketed pal, but the two of them apparently took a page out of Bill Clinton’s book and engaged in sexual activities with underage females on their foreign jaunts.

In a way, you can see where Sen. Menendez is coming from. After all, if accepting bribes and engaging in statutory rape aren’t to be punishable offenses, why should drunk driving and border jumping be considered such a big deal?

Whenever I hear of someone receiving a generous plea deal or even no jail time at all because the D.A. has decided it’s a first offense, my head explodes.

For one thing, it is highly unlikely that the guy is going to be arrested and indicted the first time he decides to break the law. For another, it would make more sense to make the first arrest, if it really is the first, especially harsh so that it might actually serve as a deterrent. The last thing a society should want is for a criminal to get a slap on the wrist and say to himself, “Well, that wasn’t so bad.”

In the wake of the political brouhaha in Virginia, a Breaking News item has gone viral on the Internet: Shoe polish manufacturers are now adding a warning label for products sold to Democrats: “Do not apply to face.”

Republicans in Congress are always quaking in their booties, fearful that if Donald Trump does something adventurous such as using the Army Corps of Engineers to build his wall, a future Democratic president might use that as precedent to do something equally foolhardy.

Apparently, Republicans are not only cowardly, but suffer from a form of amnesia that erases the sins of Democrats from their consciousness. The Democrats, as every Republican in Congress should realize by now, don’t rely on precedent; that’s because they’ve got a full complement of guts. What they lack are brains.

Have the Republicans really forgotten so quickly that Harry Reid broke two centuries of tradition in using the nuclear option to seat federal judges; that Obama squandered a trillion dollars on Solyndra and a “shovel-ready” job stimulus; lied about the Affordable Care Act; and air-mailed $150 billion to his Islamic comrades in Iran? And the Democrats didn’t even break a sweat, knowing full well that, precedent or no precedent, their Republican colleagues would never have the nerve to behave so boldly.

Jeff Bezos, the man behind Amazon and the Washington Post, may be undergoing the worst mid-life crisis in human history. Not only did he start an adulterous affair, but he sent the other woman selfies of his private parts which somehow fell into the hands of the National Enquirer. (The photos, that is, not, thank heavens, his private parts.)

It has led to a divorce that will cost him $70 billion and custody of his four children, but the schnook is doing all this for a trophy who is older than his wife.

If Bezos had been half as smart as he is rich, he would have bought himself a Ferrari and a hair piece.

The irony of the situation, as Glenn Greenwald pointed out to Tucker Carlson, is that Bezos got into this mess because the National Enquirer invaded his privacy, but Bezo’s own company, the all-intrusive Amazon, has been invading its customers’ privacy for years to its own financial advantage.

One of the latest presidential aspirants, Sen. Amy Klobucher, is apparently such a nasty harridan that a large number of her staffers have quit rather than put up with her demands that they wash her dishes and pick up her dry cleaning while having obscenities hurled at them.

But Klobucher still believes she’d make a great president because she cares so much for the little people.

I’m reminded that the ex-wife of William Saroyan, the lady who later went on to marry Walter Matthau, could have been describing every damn hypocritical liberal in the world when she said of Saroyan: “He loved humanity, but he hated people.”

To be fair, it’s not just Klobucher, it’s every single Democrat who took part in the public lynching of Brett Kavanaugh, all of whom knew that Christine Blasey Ford, an obvious political operative, was lying, but nevertheless accused a decent man in front of his parents, his wife and his two daughters, of being a serial rapist.

Finally, people are constantly sending me the same list of little-known facts, such as a dime has 118 ridges around its edge and that a goldfish has a memory span of just three seconds, which happens to be two seconds longer than the typical Republican member of Congress. (Although how anyone but a goldfish would ever know this is anybody’s guess. The real tragedy is that even if a goldfish was made aware of this failing, he’d forget it in four seconds.)

But there was one item on the list that jumped out at me. It seems that an Ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain. It made me wonder if that meant Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is an ostrich.

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