The Patriot Post® · A Clash of Cretins

By Burt Prelutsky ·
https://patriotpost.us/opinion/82145-a-clash-of-cretins-2021-08-30

Just when I was ready to hand the title to the President of the United States for making a series of blunders when it came to our retreat from Afghanistan, we hear that the Taliban are not allowing Americans to cross the checkpoints surrounding the airport. And for good measure, the ragheads are beating them up.

Are the Taliban really that sorry to see us leave? Just like that they have finally given us a good reason to go to war in that country. And this time, let there be no holding back. This is no time for niceties. It’s war. Collateral damage should be of no consequence. If you’re going to fight with one arm tied behind your back, you’ll not only lose, but you will deserve to lose.

I keep hearing how it’s a moral imperative that we rescue every Afghan who ever translated for us, cooked us a meal or shined a pair of American boots. As I see it, there was a civil war, and we took sides. We were doing one side a favor. In the fight, we did our share of the dying and we supplied all the weaponry. Heck, we fought alongside the Soviet military in World War II. That didn’t mean we had to swing our doors open to millions of Communists after we defeated Nazi Germany. Besides, we already had enough of the home-grown variety.

Frankly, I don’t welcome flying thousands of Muslims into our country. It hasn’t improved any of the European nations that foolishly put their tolerance and naivety on display a few years ago by letting in hordes of Syrians. It merely put their women in danger and spiked their crime statistics.

But if the Taliban are attacking Americans who merely want to get out of that godforsaken hell hole, that’s a better reason to unleash our military might than we’ve had in any war since 1945.

Joe Biden, who’s lied every step of the way, first insisting that the Taliban didn’t have the capability of taking over the country to claiming that Al Qaeda had no presence in Afghanistan and finally that his handling of our exit was perfect and that the rest of the world was looking on in awe and admiration. He said this even as our planes were flying out with 60% capacity and our military, unlike the Brits and the French who were going out and rescuing their countrymen, were ordered not to leave the airport because of a promise Biden had allegedly made to the terrorists.

In a statement, totally unsupported by reality, Biden declared to our besieged diplomats “We will get you home.”

Notice he didn’t say “alive.”


Closer to home, we still have illegal aliens strolling into our country in record numbers. Always seeking a solution to a problem, I came up with one I think might work. I suggest that we give our over-worked border agents a much-deserved rest. Instead, we should hire the drug cartels to guard the border. All we have to do is pay them more than the aliens are paying to get them across.

Those who are a little squeamish about our getting into bed with these creeps, should consider the people who are pulling all the strings in our nation — folks like George Soros, Susan Rice, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer, Jeff Zucker, Bernie Sanders, Rashida Tlaib, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Maxine Waters, Barack Obama, Anthony Fauci, Ilhan Omar and Gretchen Whitmer — before you cast stones.


This being the sign-up month for subscription renewals, I have naturally been paying pretty close attention to who is signing up and who isn’t. A few people have bothered to explain why they’re passing. Some are in financial straits and refuse to accept a price reduction out of pride. Some are just too busy. Some, I have to assume have died since last August.

But I noticed that a friend, a Democrat and a Hollywood agent, to boot, had neither renewed nor let me know he wasn’t. So instead of the usual mass-mailing, I wrote to him specifically.

It led to the following exchange, which I’m printing in full because I think it clearly shows the problem with debating a Liberal.

It began with my asking why I hadn’t heard from him. Had he also been hospitalized?

No, he hadn’t. He wrote back to say: “While I hope we can do another of our lunches before long, and I do enjoy your writing (of course) I have found too many comments recently that I can’t support financially.”

Burt: “How do you mean ‘financially’? If you mean that you objected to some of my comments and don’t feel you should send me a renewal check, I understand that. But I haven’t noticed a change in my writing because my opinions about most things have not changed since last year. Do you recall the nature of the odious comments? Not necessarily the specifics, but the general subject matter? I still like you and would be happy to have lunch.”

Frank: “The comments were generally about African-Americans and were exaggerations, not unlike the time I took you to task for saying ‘most lawyers are liberals…”

Burt: “In the context, my comment about lawyers was obviously referring to criminal defense attorneys, and I will stick to that contention. As for exaggerations, do you recall any? For instance, did they deal with the fact that blacks support BLM; tend not to raise their offspring in two-parent homes; are heavily involved in the drug trade, both as buyers and sellers; will riot over any excuse, even the death of a career criminal, just for the chance to steal, burn and vandalize with impunity; barely tolerate education; keep electing the likes of Cori Bush, Maxine Waters, Kamala Harris and Ayanna Pressley; and commit over 50% of the violent crimes — and more like 95% when it comes to Asian victims — although young black males only constitute about 4% of the population? "I am certainly open to debate on any or all of these 'exaggerations,’ even if you are no longer a subscriber. Otherwise you are just parroting platitudes because you’re Jewish (not usually a bad thing, except when it comes to politics) and involved in show business (usually a bad thing).”

Frank: “There you go again with ‘will riot over any excuse’ and ‘will barely tolerate education.’ Those are generalizations. I don’t like generalizations about blacks any more than I do about any other group of people, be it ‘All Jews are cheap,’ ‘All gay men like musicals,’ ‘All women get over-emotional’ or ‘All Asians are good at math.’”

Burt: “I suspect you will discover if you pay close attention that in the coming week you will generalize about something or some group. Probably actors, and it won’t be complimentary. Generalizing is something that normal people do. It is understood that there are always exceptions, although nearly all gay men do like musicals and there may be one or two Asians somewhere in the universe who aren’t so hot at math.

"I am very friendly with a black family that lives across the street, but would you expect me to write that although 73% of black fathers don’t raise their own children; thousands of blacks riot over the death of thugs resisting arrest and commit violent crimes far in excess to their small numbers; and if white people murdered as many black babies as black women do, they’d call it genocide; but Dodie, Frank and Butch are the exceptions?

"The problem is that at least two of the four examples you came up with are provably false, but when 94% of blacks vote for Democrats, whether those voters are rich, poor, educated, uneducated, churchgoers or atheists, it is just silly for you to draw a line in the sand over those who have been attacking Orientals because of their skin color; promoting racial segregation on college campuses; and pushing a racist concoction known as Critical Race Theory.

"It is one thing to be a lifelong Democrat, Frank, but another to come across as a naive child just to show how tolerant you are. It’s called virtue signaling, and those who engage in it aren’t being virtuous, they’re simply being vainglorious, presuming to possess the deed to the moral high ground. Best wishes, Burt”

So far, I haven’t heard back, so lunch plans are still up in the air.

You can email Burt directly at [email protected].