The Patriot Post® · From The Comedy Store
Superman renounces his U.S. citizenship in Action Comics this month. It’s so Iranians won’t think he’s a U.S. spy when he attends a peace rally in Teheran. Superman will be sorry he did this when the TSA pulls him out for extra screening every time he wants to fly.
President Obama was furious that his press briefing was delayed until Donald Trump finished speaking in New Hampshire. He’s not the only one angry. Charlie Sheen is suing Donald Trump for replacing him as the Most Interesting man in the World.
President Obama was ripped by carnival barkers after he compared Donald Trump to them. Carnival barkers lure people to come into your store and spend their cash. Leave it to Obama to be out there belittling the one talent that can save the economy.
Wal-Mart announced it’ll bring back the sale of guns and rifles in U.S. stores in an effort to boost slumping store sales. The logic behind the decision makes sense. Why should undercover ATF agents make all the money from selling guns to Mexican drug lords?
North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il said he supports full and open talks with South Korea in opening up trade. It’s out of necessity. He made a fortune counterfeiting U.S. currency but now that it isn’t worth anything he has to find another way to pay the bills.
President Obama flew to Cape Canaveral to talk with America’s last astronaut crew in the Space Shuttle program. We spent a hundred billion dollars to build the Space Station and now the only way to get there is to hitchhike. A lot of homeowners know the feeling.
The FAA reshuffled top management after firing seven air traffic controllers for sleeping in the tower on the job. Let’s not waste good people. A poll shows that seventy percent of Americans want the fired air traffic controllers rehired as IRS auditors.
Osama bin Laden was tracked down and killed in a firefight with U.S. Navy seals at his hideout in Pakistan on Sunday. It just wasn’t his day. First he gets killed here on earth and then the next thing he knows he’s being greeted in Paradise by seventy-two Virginians.
Osama bin Laden was found in a home a mile from a golf club and Pakistan’s military academy. Nice digs. When President Obama heard that bin Laden was near a golf course, it took the Secret Service to prevent him from getting on the helicopter with the Navy Seals.
The White House hesitated Tuesday to release photos of Osama bin Laden. They said they didn’t want kids to see it in newspapers. The chance that anyone under forty will ever see a newspaper is so remote and so slim that it really shouldn’t factor into the decision.
President Obama announced Wednesday he will not release the photos of Osama bin Laden’s body taken right after the raid. He was shot and killed by U.S. Navy SEALs just two hours before he was fed to actual seals. Democrats never pass up an opportunity to recycle.
Pittsburgh Steelers runner Rashard Mendenhall caused a flap by tweeting a message sympathetic to Osama bin Laden. He said we should wait until we hear bin Laden’s side of things. It’s just more evidence that the brain isn’t fully formed until you are twenty-five.
President Obama rose in approval ratings following the raid which killed bin Laden at his hideout in Pakistan after years of intelligence gathering. The terrorist was brought to justice thanks to waterboarding, wiretapping, and targeted assassination. It’s funny how the one time President Obama should have blamed something on George W Bush, he didn’t.
© Copyright 2010 Argus Hamilton