September 27, 2013

The Taliban’s Positive Attributes?

Middle school assignment: Write an essay on all the positive attributes of the Taliban.

Hey folks, Alexander here – just got an email from the wife of a good friend. He is an Army officer just beginning another tour in Afghanistan, while she is holding down the home fort with their three kids. She writes, “My 6th grader came home with an English class assignment to write about all the positive aspects of the Taliban – while his dad is deployed to Afghanistan. Called the teacher and she was at a loss for words.”

I wrote her back and let her know, as usual, that I am not at a loss for words. I suggested we have some fun with this one, so I’ve started a list of the many positive attributes of the Taliban, at least from our perspective! Here are some of the entries I suggested for her son’s assignment:

Their food sucks. Their clothes suck. Their tents suck. Their vehicles suck. Their tactics suck. They have a bad habit of poking their head up when things get quiet. They move in such close proximity that you can get credit for a two-fer-one shot! You can smell them two clicks away. You can smell their women five clicks away.

Feel free to add your own suggestions!

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