TSA Takes Nail Clippers From Armed Soldier

Nov. 19, 2010

File this one under “Non Compos Mentis.” Several hundred National Guard troops were flying back home from Afghanistan when they ran into the TSA at Indianapolis. As one of the soldiers described it, “That’s where the stupid started.”

The soldier said, “It’s probably important to mention that we were ALL carrying weapons. Everyone was carrying an M4 Carbine (rifle) and some, like me, were also carrying an M9 pistol. Oh, and our gunners had M-240B machine guns. Of course, the weapons weren’t loaded. And we had been cleared of all ammo well before we even got to customs at Baghram, then AGAIN at customs.”

Any sane person would be reasonably sure this contingent didn’t include any would-be terrorists. Not the TSA.

One soldier had a Gerber multi-tool confiscated, and a TSA agent insisted that another turn over his finger nail clippers. According to the soldier reporting the story, “The conversation went something like this:”

TSA Guy: You can’t take those on the plane.

Soldier: What? I’ve had them since we left country.

TSA Guy: You’re not suppose to have them.

Soldier: Why?

TSA Guy: They can be used as a weapon.

Soldier: [touches butt stock of the rifle] But this actually is a weapon. And I’m allowed to take it on.

TSA Guy: Yeah but you can’t use it to take over the plane. You don’t have bullets.

Soldier: And I can take over the plane with nail clippers?

TSA Guy: [awkward silence]

Me: Dude, just give him your damn nail clippers so we can get the f–k out of here. I’ll buy you a new set.

Soldier: [hands nail clippers to TSA guy, makes it through security]

This might be a good time to remind everyone that approximately 233 people re-boarded that plane with assault rifles, pistols, and machine guns – but nothing that could have been used as a weapon.

There, don’t you feel safer?

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95 Comments

Olivia said:

Me (dripping with sarcasm): I am so glad that the essence of stupidity is alive and well in our country!

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 11:43 AM

Brad said:

TSA: Really!?National Guard troops: thank-youand, i read it this way; - Soldier: I CAN take over the plane with nail clippers!!

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 11:53 AM

Anton D Rehling in Olympia, WA said:

Wow, I am so relieved to know that those dangerous nail clippers were confiscated from those dangerous US Army soldiers. It is also nice to know that M4 Carbines can only be used as a weapon if they are loaded, although there are a few jihads that have been beaten to death with the butt of an M4 that might dispute that fact. I am having a hard time working now as I can’t stop laughing at the pure stupidity and at the same time I am mad as hell for the political correctness of treating those who have been responsible for protecting this country at the risk of their lives as potential terrorists.

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 12:50 PM

Norge said:

You can take my nail clippers when you pry them from my cold, dead hands.

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 12:58 PM

contrary1 said:

@NorgeMr Heston would be so proud!ROFLOL

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 1:36 PM

Jim G said:

In case you need a book to tell you what you already know, Dr. Lyle Rossiter, Jr., M.D., wrote a book about modern liberalism's irrationality being the product of psychopathology: a massive transference neurosis acted out in the world's political arenas, with devastating effects on the institutions of liberty:"So extravagant are the patterns of thinking, emoting, behaving and relating that characterize the liberal mind that its relentless protests and demands become understandable only as disorders of the psyche." ~ Dr. Lyle Rossiter Jr., M.D. - The Liberal Mind; The Psychological Causes of Political Madness. October 30, 2006.

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 1:46 PM

chuck said:

That's pretty good, did this TSA guy ever think that soldiers were taught to improvise, overcome, and adapt. I think he just wanted to impose his selfwill on someone so he could feel better about himself. the poor loser!

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 6:45 PM

Peggie said:

If there had been only one or two National Guard troops, I bet they could have taken over the plane,without their guns and their nail clippers, becausethe TSA guy couldn't take away their courage northeir brains!

Friday, November 19, 2010 at 8:36 PM

Ruth Ann Wilson said:

UNBELIEVABLE."They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety"Benjamin FranklinAnd I will add: if you give up that essential liberty, you will not have liberty nor SAFETY.New Hampshire State Motto:"Live Free or Die"For God & CountryThe American

Saturday, November 20, 2010 at 11:22 AM

Rose Brock said:

I am glad I saw this email. I was reviewing my items for my next flight and this is the truth I'd just added a small fingernail clipper

Saturday, November 20, 2010 at 11:26 AM

Ron W. Brown said:

Like Ron White says, "You can't fix stupid!".

Saturday, November 20, 2010 at 12:00 PM

Howard Last in Wyoming said:

A few years ago we were coming back from a cruise. My wife always carries a sewing kit (buttons fall off and seams open up). The kit contained a small scissor (1 1/2" blade). She by mistake left it in her carry on. The TSA moron (I should not insult morons) said she could not take it. At the same time the flight crew was walking by. She then asked the pilot would he please carry it on. I can't as they think I will hijack myself.

Saturday, November 20, 2010 at 1:19 PM

JOHN CLAIREAUX SIMON said:

Okay, first off I am US Army Retired... I am also a descendent of George Bernard Shaw Clairveaux which I only found out a year ago. I am a loving father and loving son, born and educated in the USA. So many things and I dont know how much space I have here, I want to thank you for contacting me. I am a visionary, I have been writing poetry since I was 12 years old and my uncle told me a few months before he died of pancreatic cancer in 1985, while we were walking around the block that he saw in my poetry great depth and vision and someday I will be called upon not for wealth and not for power but called upon to stand up with my vision. He sensed something, he did not know what it was but he sensed, that I had something inside me very powerful that would emerge. Now my uncle was a great man and when he died more than 5000 men came to his funeral weeping and all had something to say. I miss him and he is my guiding light. He was jewish and born in the USA he was on the first wave at omaha beach and survived and went on to be one of the early founders of the NY Marathon when only 50 men ran it. When there was no advertising no fan fare the reason I tell you this because as patriots we all have history that is in our bone marrow. That alcohol and drugs do not diminish, it is who we are inside that defines us. Now we are engaged in an almost invisible enemy and the 7th century barbarism that can not compete with new ideas and compassion and creative invention threatens the very existence of free men throughout the world. We can squabble about politics the left and the right but the democratic party has been hijacked by muslim extremist that are using their tools of soros and obama to complete the mission of total anilation of free people here in America and the world..Backing down and negotiating with pure evil is not an option and I request here and now that all police departments, state and towns and military installations lock their gates and fortify, do not allow the inspection by dept of justice, FBI and Homeland security to enter for any reason. Even a direct order by the commander and chief should not be allowed. Even if they offer 25 pizzas for a celebration do not open the gates. Obama thru the dept of justice has spent 20 million dollars to allow 80,000 muslim refugees to enter American soil, even if one of these people is linked or is a hamas terrorist, America is in grave danger. Because hamas is the butcher arm of Iran. Do the math 80,000 divided by 50 states is 1600 per state if they are distributed evenly and I dont think they will I think they will be sent to major cities. Right now in NYC over a million muslims live in harmony and peace. But they do not denounce terror within their religion so they are dormant.All it would take is a hundred hamas to incite them and we are in big trouble. Our defenses are extremely weak and vulnerable, if a convoy of Homeland security shows up at a military installation and requests a formation for review, muslim extremist armmed with machine guns could cut down an entire fort population, then use all of the weapons, ammo and trucks, tanks and apcs, whatever in the fort at their diosposal and move across America, picking up speed state by state..No one would be able to stop them not even the tea party, you dont stop tanks and 50 cal with shotguns and pitch forks. Am I a alarmist maybe so, but I had a nightmare and I rarely have nightmares and it was ugly. Our enemys have been paid off, right now all across America the 2nd ammendment has been shot down or in the process of getting shot down.Case in point, John Wayne Schrader, I saw it went on a few errands came back and it was removed from internet. But from memory the case goes like this, John Wayne Schrader US Navy retired was defending his family and home by a street gang and fired shots over the gangs head. Neighbors called the police, JWS did not surrender. Local police called state police and state police contacted the FBI, the FBI,got JWS to surrender. JWS was put in jail and faced trial, at the trial, the FBI took the side of the street gang and stripped JWS of his right to bare arms. The defense team ran out of money and was still fighting the court for justice. But the FBI has endless money and endless high paid lawyers. All across America these types of injustices are taking place. Eric Holder all the Obama czars must be arrested for high treason asap. Every day he remains in office every minute our freedoms erode. He is smiling and acting like a clean cut educated tiger woods and I am not a racist, I love Allen West and Thomas Sowell but the momentum of Islamaic extremismn is ganing strength and Obama is smiling because he knows by the time America wakes up, everything wiil be in place for his miltary take over and the local town beheadings will begin. Because unlike Adolf that put innocents on top of the ditch and shot them in the head and sometimes to save bullets put 3-6 heads together to kill disarmmed Peoople, that was a quick death. Slow hacking off heads is barbaric at the very least and extremely painful and demoralizing for children to stand and watch their brothers, parents murdered like this...I say this now if the American military does not arrest obama and all his staff and agencys and everyone and declare all muslims to pass though interrogation by the USMC. If all the TSA operations and and all laws and dismantling of freedoms and unconstitutional acts since this non American citizen has taken office are not declasred null and void then I will in the name of the American Patriot and the war dead of Arlington and the tomb of the unknown soldier will start a crusade (which I plan on doing anyway)to hunt down Islamic Fundalmentalist with the largest army since the crusades. Bringing to bare starting with fifty trained dogs and I love dogs mans best friend, and increasing in strength to a hundred, two hundred, five hundred, a thousand, five thousand, twenty thousand, fifty thousand, a hundred thousand, two hundred thousand, five hundred thousand, a million, two milion, five million, ten million, twenty million, fifty million hundred million, 500 million as we free people gather across No America increasing daily to hunt down the evil snakes and wipe out the cancerous growth once and for all... With extreme predjudice...Starting in Alaska on line horizontal in increasing waves of four to five lines of beautiful hungry dogs, with 25,000 bag pipes from UK and buckingham palace guards on horse back to meet American athletes, a million laccrosse players on horse back, football players, hunters, police, firemen, all welcome. Down from Alaska to British Columbia to Manitoba to Ontario and Quebec moving south and gaining speed and gathering volunteers to meet up with the American forces of dog lovers and free patriots that have had enough of the this wretched barbarous islamic ancient vile mental sickness that would throw acid in the faces of women and chop hands off of a people that seek freedom. A wave of dogs that will be handled by patriots of all races, religions, colors, that have one thing in common the desire to keep America entact and free. Furthermore a huge army of peace loving freedom fighters that will sweep across America to hunt down, traitors of freedom and muslim extemists, dogs can smell evil, then move within the civilized conciousness of a free people across America central and south America then on to europe securing the borders as they go and wiping out those that would oppose freedom. Let us rejoice in the knowledge and power that we are a part of the melting pot of the greatest nation of freedom the world has ever known and remain the beacon of light and hope throughout the world. My organization, C.O.G.S. christian observational guard service....I am not interestd in power I would yeild to better men than me LT Colonel Allen West and Lt Colonel Oliver North and General David Petreaus..I am a poet with a vision of America lasting ten thousand years."Never in the course of human events have so many owed so much to so few",Sir Winston Churchill..Furthermore UK, France, Germany, and Israel will all help us and Canada and others will join us to burn out and castrate the islamic threat and rid this cancer once and for all..To me Obama has betrayed his oath of office as well as the Constitution as well as the American miltary and the free people of the United States of America. When he did not appear at the Veterans memorial celebration and the tomb of the unknown soldier this caused mental anguish in the American Patriot the utter dis respect for war dead, and veterans and those in harms way and continues to undermine the men and women in the department of defense, free people, and enslaved people that look to America as their savior. I would like COGS to be a new segment of the DOD and I would yield under the power and jurisdiction of the elite command to protect honor the constitution of the United states of America. In the name of the great American heroes, Ronald Regan, George Patton, Douglas Mac Arthur, Ulysses S. Grant,Black Jack Pershing, (A hundred thousand pigs in Afghanistan needed now),Westmoreland,Gen Arnold Schwarzkoff...I pray that my vision is heard....Keep "In God We Trust", on all buildings and currency and remember if the American Flag is not saluted it ceases to exist...Amen

Saturday, November 20, 2010 at 3:57 PM

Robert said:

Phew! Nice to know I can haul my M4 Carbine on the airplane now...

Saturday, November 20, 2010 at 11:28 PM

enemaofthestatistquo said:

Ever had a paper cut in an office, surprisingly painful! I can imagine it now: TSA agent speaks, "Halt! Now step away from the Beck book".

Sunday, November 21, 2010 at 8:51 PM