Upright

Columnist Peggy Noonan: “The ObamaCare rollout is a disaster for the White House, not a problem or a challenge or an embarrassment, not a gaffe or a bad few weeks. … It was Bill Daley … who Thursday, on ‘CBS This Morning,’ admitted the scale of the problem. Asked whether Kathleen Sebelius should be fired, he said: ‘To me that’s kind of like firing Captain Smith on the Titanic after it hit the iceberg.’ The Titanic. Some will see his comments as disloyal. Actually they were candid and realistic. Although in fairness, the Titanic at least had three good days, and Edward Smith chose to go down with the ship.”

From the ‘Non Compos Mentis’ File

The BIG Lie

David Axelrod: “The majority of people in this country – the vast majority of people in this country – are keeping their plan.”

Village Idiots

Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services director Marilyn Tavenner: “[W]hat I can guarantee is that we have a system [Healthcare.gov] that’s working. … It’s just not working at the speed that we want and at the success rate that want. Those are the things we’re working on.”

Demo-gogues

Barack Obama: “One year ago, Hurricane Sandy’s landfall devastated communities up and down the East Coast – a tragedy that demanded massive rescue, recovery, and rebuilding efforts. … Over the past year, my Administration has fought for these communities throughout the response, and the federal government will remain by their side as our fellow citizens rebuild. … That’s who we are as Americans – we take care of our own. We leave nobody behind.”

(Unless you’re an ambassador under a terrorist attack in Benghazi just before a pivotal election…)

Dezinformatia

Radio talk-show host Leslie Marshall: “No matter how much security we have, things like [the Benghazi terrorist attack] can happen. Let’s keep in mind, Ambassador Stevens was the one who wanted to be in Benghazi; Ambassador Stevens was the one who wanted to branch out from Tripoli to Benghazi.”

Alpha Jackass

Filmmaker Michael Moore: “Since 1980 the policies in this country have been driven by the Christian right. They took over and they turned this country into the dark ages and we’re so far behind now with science, education, health care, everything.”

Short Cuts

Comedian Jay Leno: “According to a new report, more than 700 fake Obamacare websites have been created. Security experts say it’s simple to identify the phony sites because they are easy to log on to. … The Obamacare website is not the only one crashing. The NSA website went offline Friday after suspected hackers broke into it. Hey, NSA: It’s not so much fun when people are sneaking into YOUR computer, is it?”