The Gipper: “Freedom is the right to question and change the established way of doing things. It is the continuous revolution of the marketplace. It is the understanding that allows to recognize shortcomings and seek solutions.”

Upright: “The public is appropriately alarmed about exactly who we might be letting in. It would be easy, and commonsensical, to follow their prompting and pause the refugee program, figure out how to screen those seeking entrance more carefully, and let in only the peaceable. If that takes time, it takes time. If Mr. Obama had wisdom as opposed to pride and a desire to smack around the GOP … he would recognize the refugee issue as a distraction from the most urgent priorities.” —Peggy Noonan

Braying Jackass: “A divided court of appeals has upheld an unprecedented nationwide injunction against implementing a federal immigration enforcement policy of great national importance, and has done so in violation of established limits on the judicial power.” —Solicitor General Donald Verrilli on Obama’s appeal of his immigration order to the Supreme Court (Verrilli is trying to defend unconstitutional executive overreach.)

Alpha Jackass: “[The GOP] is a party that rejects science and refuses to understand that climate change is real. I understand if you stand up to the Koch brothers and the fossil fuel industry that you’ll lose your campaign contributions. [Climate change] is already causing devastating problems all over this world. To hell with the fossil fuel industry. Worry more about your children and your grandchildren than your campaign contributions.” —Bernie Sanders

Non Compos Mentis: “Republicans care more about kowtowing to the NRA than preventing terrorists from legally buying assault rifles and explosives like the ones used in the Paris attacks here in America.” —Harry Reid

Demo-gogues: “Right now, our political system does not work as well as it should. And what I would say to young leaders, what sort of pitfalls should you avoid, I would say, number one, it is very important to avoid any political system where money overwhelms ideas.” —Barack Obama (Says the guy whose last campaign topped $1 billion in donations.)

Late-night humor: “In his recent interview with GQ, President Obama said that he’d like to own an NBA team after he leaves the White House. You’ll know it’s Obama’s team when it takes the players five years to pass something.” —Jimmy Fallon