Insight: “The pen is mightier than the sword.” —William Shakespeare (1564-1616)

Upright: “While exchange enrollment is well-below expectations, about 13 million more people are enrolled in Medicaid in 2015 than in 2013. That anyone would be proud of throwing more people into Medicaid has never made any sense to me. The best that can be said about Medicaid is that it gives poor people something they didn’t have before. However, it’s hardly the best way to give the poorest in America better health outcomes.” —Veronique de Rugy

Alpha Jackass: “[Ted Cruz is] worse than Hillary when you think about it.” —Donald Trump

It’s a conspiracy! “Two months ago, there was a Politico report that directly challenged the finding of this inspector general [investigating Hillary Clinton’s email scandal], and I don’t think he liked that very much. So I think that he put two Republican senators up to sending him a letter so that he would have an excuse to resurface the same allegations he made back in the summer that have been discredited.” —Clinton campaign spokesman Brian Fallon

Belly laugh of the week: “We have a lot of candidates who [are] like the ‘Prince of Darkness.’ I consider myself the ‘Prince of Light and Hope’ and I don’t spend all my time getting people riled up about how bad everything is.” —John Kasich (So who was that pissed off guy at the GOP debates?)

The BIG Lie: “I have complete confidence that the common sense [gun control] steps announced by the president are lawful. They are consistent with the Constitution as interpreted by the Supreme Court and the laws passed by Congress.” —Attorney General Loretta Lynch

Friendly fire: “We need a more progressive tax code — not confiscatory policy. Not socialism. A tax code.” —Joe Biden (But how are Sanders’ proposals any different from Obama’s policies?)

Late-night humor: “Amazon has begun revealing details about its upcoming drone delivery program, such as drones adapted specifically to the climate of the city they are in. For example, the Chicago drone will be equipped to handle cold weather, the Seattle drone will be waterproof, and the Detroit drone will be on fire.” —Seth Meyers