December 4, 2021

Boiling Frogs

I can’t help thinking that we Americans are being boiled to death by the Communists who are calling themselves Democrats.

I suspect that by this time everyone has heard that the secret to boiling frogs is to place it in a pot of water and slowly, ever so slowly, turn up the heat so the amphibian doesn’t realize what’s happening until it’s too late for it to leap out of the water and save itself.

I can’t help thinking that we Americans are being boiled to death by the Communists who are calling themselves Democrats this season. The chief difference between our plight and that of the frogs is our tormenters have decided to suddenly turn up the heat because, one, they’re afraid they won’t have control of the gas range a year from now and, two, because they have grown cocky over the past two years, as they saw how easily they could turn us from citizens into subjects.

Let’s face it — two years ago, you would never have imagined that politicians could force us to wear masks; avoid getting together with friends and family; be denied our rights to worship in churches and synagogues; be denied visits to sick or dying loved ones; be denied employment or even the chance to serve in the military if we’re not vaccinated, although this is the first “vaccine” in history that, apparently, neither protects you from a disease nor prevents you from contaminating others.

In the name of public safety, even little children, the least likely group to be infected are being forced to get the shot, all because the Left demands acquiescence from everyone, and because schmucks like Bill Gates, for whom a hundred billion dollars is never enough, are heavily invested in pharmaceutical companies, which are experiencing windfalls that were unimaginable as recently as 2019.

Speaking of billionaires, because I was curious how many black Americans are in their ranks, I Googled the answer. Instead of merely supplying the answer, which was seven, Google felt it necessary to editorialize: “614 billionaires in the U.S., and only 7 of them are black.”

I found that interesting, but predictable, because when I asked how many Latino Americans are billionaires, I learned there was one, a man named Jorge Perez, whose worth is estimated to be $1.55 billion, who is referred to as “the condo king of South Florida.” So, even though there are many more Latinos than blacks in America, I wasn’t told he was the only one, even though seven blacks were referred to as “only.”

The seven are Tyler Perry ($1 billion), who owes his fortune to his producing, directing and starring in movies; Jay-Z ($1 billion), who made his money in the music industry and through investments; Kanye West ($1.3 billion), who made his through music and a clothing line; Michael Jordan ($1.6 billion), basketball and footwear produced by slave labor in China; Oprah Winfrey ($2.5 billion), TV and a media empire; David Steward ($3.7 billion), information tech services; and Robert F. Smith ($5.2 billion) owns a private equity firm.

I don’t begrudge any of them their money, as they are all prime examples of the entrepreneurial spirit, although I do believe that Mr. Jordan has some explaining to do. He didn’t make enough money playing basketball and really had no alternative but to get into bed with the Chinese despots?

In case anyone was wondering, LeBron James, who whines about the U.S. being a systemically racist nation, is apparently only worth $600 million. He just may have to ask his business partners in China to see to it that the slaves working in the sneakers factory pick up the pace.

Lee McNary offered up the term “clean up on aisle 1600” the next time Joe Biden’s handlers have to tell us what he really meant when he made one of his usual gaffes. He suggested I take credit for it, but that’s not my way.

In case you’re wondering what my way is, it’s to mis-identify the senator and governor of Wisconsin, as I recently did. Tammy Baldwin is the senator, Tony Evers is the governor, not the other way around.

Other people have sent me a meme titled “America’s Twins,” but Joseph Neuner was first.

It’s a series of eight photos showing four of America’s least favorite politicians next to their doppelgängers. The first shows A O-C, next to a mule, both of them showing their enormous teeth and gums; next is Kamala Harris, her mouth wide open, as usual, pictured next to a laughing hyena; third is Lori Lightfoot, who looks exactly like Michael Keaton in his Beetlejuice persona; and, finally, sleepy Joe Biden, whose slits for eyes make him look spookily similar to the freaky banjo boy from “Deliverance.”

After I compared the homeless/hapless rabble in San Francisco to India’s sacred cows, C.A. Meschter wrote to point out that “Like their brothers in San Francisco, the cows also sh*t in the street.” He then apologized in case I was offended by his language. I assured him that I am never offended by those who use words appropriately.

After I pointed out in my Thanksgiving message that ever since my former agent, a Liberal, let me know he no longer wished to receive my articles, none of my subscribers are turkeys, subscriber David Evans thanked me for noting he is not a turkey.

That served to remind me that turkeys are so stupid that one of my late wife’s Nebraska relatives once lost his entire flock during a cloudburst when the birds all stood in the farmyard looking up at the sky with their beaks wide open. They all drowned.

When I heard the story, it struck me that it’s surprising, and rather sad, that the same thing doesn’t happen when Liberals are caught outside during a rainstorm.

Of all the people who appear to have dedicated their lives to destroying America, one of those who certainly belongs in the top five on the list of despicable creatures is Anthony Fauci. He is so repulsive in every imaginable way that I refuse to dignify him by referring to him as “Doctor.” He is no more a healthcare professional than Josef Mengele or Victor Frankenstein. He is a career bureaucrat who has managed to survive for several decades in Washington, and should have been replaced when Donald Trump had the chance.

Even if you give the pipsqueak a pass for the funding he sent to the Wuhan Lab for no discernible reason since China has more than enough money to finance its own creepy experiments, Fauci should suffer the torments of the damned for the torturing of Beagles that he funded for no other reason than that he is a sadist, just like Mengele, the Nazi butcher.

I am a member of the Writers Guild of America because in order to write film or TV scripts, one has to sign up. But it was woke even before it was cool to be woke, and I have rarely passed up a chance to ridicule it.

How woke is it? I once had to show up at its offices to register a spec screenplay, and as I walked down the corridor to the appropriate office, every office I passed had a large photo of Barack Obama on the wall.

In any case, I, along with the other 20,000 members, received a notice that the Guild was about to release a report that exposed “the lack of inclusion and equity in the entertainment industry.”

Naturally, I couldn’t allow that to pass without comment. I wrote back: “Inclusion and equity? Are we really supposed to believe there should be a quota system for employment? And if so, why would be it be based on race, age or nation of origin, and not talent?”

I’ve heard nothing back, but as I’m sure the Guild is well aware, I can be as persistent — make that as annoying — as a mosquito.

You can email Burt directly at [email protected].

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