From the Loony Left
“DOGE did have a consequence, and you see it in the failure of our FDA to protect us from s**t lettuce and the failure of our CDC to even count the number of people who are affected by s**t lettuce.” —Michigan Senate candidate Abdul El-Sayed

“It’s also very difficult to take seriously the poster child of corruption and fraud that is the president and his cabinet when they say that there’s fraud happening. They have been hell-bent on getting rid of healthcare for millions of Americans.” —Washington Congresswoman Pramila Jayapal

“I am far less worried about some person who espouses some DSA title winning and coming into our caucus than I’m worried about those who are in the Republican caucus who are complicit with the president.” —Pennsylvania Congresswoman Madeleine Dean

“There’s an argument that some make that this is a very unique political window and, oftentimes in politics, you do only get one shot.” —New York Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez warming up for a presidential run

“If you put women in charge of every government ... I have a strong belief that things would ... be better. I’m confident about that.” —Barack Obama

“I want Chinese-style communism to happen inside of the Democratic Party right now. I want to do Cultural Revolution s**t.” —Hasan Piker

“If they require a Muslim registry, I will be the first in line to sign up as a Muslim.” —Illinois Governor JB Pritzker

“Trump blocked clean energy projects. ... It’s like an economic dictatorship.” —Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer

“[Trump] is ... hurting [Americans’] health by increasing climate change.” —former Washington Governor Jay Inslee

“[The SAVE America Act] is a poll tax on married women.” —Georgia Senator Raphael Warnock

“[Benjamin Netanyahu] is one of the most vulgar, vicious, criminal leaders any nation has ever had. ... He should be 100% in prison for the rest of his life for war crimes.” —Joy Reid

From the Reasonable Right
“[Abdul El-Sayed] must be desperate, because there’s no way that Kamala Harris is an asset on the campaign trail.” —Miranda Devine

“I think that the people running Iran are reptiles, and they’re part of a colony of reptiles — China, North Korea, Russia, and, as I said, Iran. The chief reptile, the quarterback, is President Xi in China. You can’t trust any of them. All four of them are the same. It’s like the same hooker in different dresses. They all lie like timeshare salesmen. ... I wouldn’t turn my back on any of them, even if I thought and knew they were two days dead.” —Louisiana Senator John Kennedy

“I agree with the president’s diagnosis, but I don’t agree with the cure. ... I think you treat everybody the same, and I think the American people can figure all this stuff out on their own.” —John Kennedy regarding Donald Trump’s press pool ban attempt

“Just because you have a policy problem here or there with President Trump doesn’t mean you have to vote for higher taxes and open borders.” —Scott Jennings

“Dem argument is always essentially ‘why aren’t you putting this fire out that we started fast enough?’” —Scott Jennings

“If you want to abolish ICE, start by abolishing Congress, because they wrote the law that ICE is enforcing. ICE isn’t making this up.” —border czar Tom Homan

“If you haven’t heard of Flock, all I have to say is Flock’s probably heard of you.” —Missouri Senator Josh Hawley

“If Israel was a Muslim country, there never would have been anyone called a Palestinian.” —David Harsanyi

Belly Laugh of the Day
“The 81st General Assembly of the United Nations entered a high-level week of talks this week, with delegates demanding that the world take the organization seriously.” —The Babylon Bee