March 9, 2026

Botox Boss Launches America-Hating Elitist Tour

The Trump-deranged Bruce Springsteen has announced a lefty protest concert tour, but his ticket prices would make a king blush.

Anyone who wonders why white men voted 60-38 for Donald Trump over Kamala Harris in 2024 need only look at or listen to Bruce Springsteen to figure out why.

Springsteen, the Trump-deranged troubadour who recently announced his so-called “Land of Hope and Dreams” concert tour, has long since abandoned his carefully cultivated working-class persona for the trappings of leftist elitism. He’s a fake, a fraud, a phony, and even his diehard fans are figuring it out.

“We are living through dark, disturbing, and dangerous times,” said the septuagenarian Springsteen in announcing his 20-date tour, “but do not despair — the cavalry is coming!”

The cavalry, eh? Since when does the cavalry dive deeply into progressive politics, scrape by in $50 million Beverly Hills mansions, and squirt botulinum toxin into their facial muscles to disappear the crow’s feet that are the natural byproduct of aging?

And since when does the No Kings Cavalry charge four figures for a freaking concert ticket?

The Botox Boss continued, “We will be rocking your town in celebration and in defense of America, American democracy, American freedom, our American Constitution, and our sacred American dream — all of which are under attack by our wannabe king and his rogue government.”

But here’s the hilarious part: He then added, “Everyone, regardless of where you stand or what you believe in, is welcome.” So he’s going to trash the “wannabe king” Trump, and he’s going to gouge his gullible fans as much as $7,000 for floor seats or $1,000 for upper seats. Is this a great country or what?

“I couldn’t be more disappointed in the Boss,” said one disillusioned fan beneath Springsteen’s Instagram post. “How do these outrageous ticket prices reflect the land of hopes and dreams? The hopes and dreams of poor people who can’t afford your tickets.” Indeed, Springsteen’s prices are fit for a king.

Nope, the same guy who once wrote how we “sweat it out on the streets of a runaway American Dream” is now sweating it out about whether his fans will finally say, Enough is enough, and abandon him in droves.

On the other hand, I know that sounds like an awful lot of money to pay to go to a concert, but maybe the Boss is tacitly admitting that Donald Trump’s economy is just so smokin’ hot that folks shouldn’t worry about paying seven grand to see him whine about kings and such.

Springsteen’s concert announcement comes on the heels of his release of a hackneyed anti-ICE (read: anti-law enforcement) single called “Streets of Minneapolis,” which makes nails on a chalkboard sound like Sinatra, makes Bad Brains sound like Lawrence Welk. Indeed, never did Public Enemy sound so soothing as it did after listening to this bit of hard-left caterwauling.

Springsteen must not have gotten the memo, but our two political parties have done a switcheroo in recent years. Yes, the Democrats have always been the Party of Big Government, but now they’re also firmly ensconced as the elites, the paternalists, the Chardonnay-sippers, the advanced-degree types, and the party of the obscenely rich — Elon Musk being the exception. Republicans, on the other hand, are increasingly the workers, the grinders, the middle managers, the folks in the field and on the shop floor.

Billionaire? his lefty fans will surely shriek. What about Trump? But while it’s true that Donald Trump is also a billionaire, he doesn’t pretend not to be. He owns it authentically and unapologetically. Unlike Springsteen, who prattles on about “wannabe kings” while splitting his time among multiple mansions.

Truth be told, Springsteen lost a lot of fans back in February 2021, when, just in time for that year’s Super Bowl, he recorded a droning two-minute ad that he called “The Middle” and dedicated to “The ReUnited States of America,” as if the rigged election of a basement-bound backslapper would bring us all together. Frankly, I don’t know what was worse — the ad itself or the assumption by Jeep that aligning itself with such a preposterous fraud would be good for business. (I mean, everyone knows that unmarried leftist catwomen only drive Subarus.)

Here’s hoping folks see through this charade and the charlatan behind it. Here’s hoping they stay away in droves.

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