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June 6, 2014

Friday Funnies

Humor from your favorite comedians.

Fred Thompson: “At a White House event, President Obama said, ‘I learned so many lessons playing sports that I carry to this day.’ Oh, like trading five star players for one 7th round draft pick?”

Frank J. Fleming: “The new White House position seems to be that everyone in the military other than Bergdahl is awful.”

Frank J. Fleming: “Mr. President, during speeches blink three times in rapid succession if you are only saying things because the Taliban is making you.”

Argus Hamilton: “Gwyneth Paltrow ignited a storm by likening her problems as a movie star to the life of a soldier in war. The two jobs have one big difference. If you’re fighting in Afghanistan and you need to take the day off, the director of the Taliban doesn’t agree to shoot around you.”

Argus Hamilton: “Jay Carney resigned as White House Press Secretary. For three years he defended Obama through the IRS, NSA, AP spying, Benghazi, and VA scandals plus the Obamacare rollout. Jay Carney is leaving to take a less stressful job – defusing nuclear bombs in New Mexico.”

Argus Hamilton: “Obama accepted the resignation of his press secretary two hours after his VA secretary resigned as hearings loomed on the Benghazi scandal and the IRS targeting of conservatives. It is not looking good for the president. Today his teleprompter took the Fifth.”

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