This just in: “The obvious reality, as long-time users know, is that Twitter has failed in trust & safety for a very long time and has interfered in elections. Twitter 2.0 will be far more effective, transparent and even-handed.” —Elon Musk

Critical corruption: “The Biden family scandal — the millions of dollars that agents of the Chinese government (among other agents of corrupt and hostile regimes) poured into the family coffers during the Obama and Trump years — cannot be disaggregated from Biden administration policy positions on China. … If there were such a Republican president, there would not be the slightest hesitancy to brand him ‘purchased by China.’ But in our reality, the president purchased by China is a Democrat, so the media-Democrat complex and its abettors in the bureaucracy would prefer that we not discuss it. No prob, right?” —Andrew McCarthy

Backwards thinking: “News flash: If you outlaw abortions, criminalize providing gender affirming care for trans youth, dictate what educators can teach in schools, and stop people from voting, you’re not the party of ‘limited government.’” —Robert Reich (“News flash: if you stump for the limitless killing of the unborn, seek legalized gender mutilation for minors, and advocate indoctrination of children by state employees against the values of their parents, you’re not the party of ‘protecting children.’” —Ben Shapiro)

Unbelievable brazenness: “Nations like China and Russia took a look at what we did in Afghanistan … and had to marvel at the speed, the efficiency of their effectiveness that very small number … of troops … are able to move that many Afghans safely out of that country. No other nation in the world can do that.” —Pentagon spokesman John Kirby (Thirteen murdered American service members would beg to differ.)

Memory lane from 2018: “The more we learn about the 2016 election the more ILLEGITIMATE it becomes. America deserves to know whether we have a FAKE President in the Oval Office.” —Hakeem Jeffries, the election denier just chosen to replace Nancy Pelosi as Democrat leader

Uh, we know inflation took off immediately: “We passed the American Rescue Plan. Now everybody knows it, but we did so much, no one knows the effects of it yet. It’s just coming into play. So many things you’re going to find out that we’ve already done that we haven’t been able to actually implement yet.” —Joe Biden

Government is here to help? “What’s most exciting about it is people are starting to feel a sense of optimism and the impact of these legislative achievements in their own lives. It’s going to accelerate in the months ahead. We’re going to be the supply chain. And the difference is that we’re going to make the supply chain available to the rest of the world. We’re not going to be hostage anymore.” —Joe Biden

Re: Leftist Big Business: “Don’t be a vassal of the [Chinese Communist Party] on one hand and then use your corporate power in the United States on the other to suffocate Americans and try to suppress their right to express themselves.” —Ron DeSantis regarding Apple and the ChiComs

Non Compos Mentis: “Twitter owner Elon Musk shared a photo of his bedside table littered with cans of Diet Coke, reminding us of the power the beverage has.” —The Washington Post

And almost last… “To be clear, I do not hate Soccer. I think it’s a fine sport for countries for whom the next big technological advance is the use of hands.” —Jeremy Boreing

And last… “Technically, everyone from Adam to Noah was an ante-Semite.” —Church Curmudgeon