Upright

“The Judeo-Christian principles upon which our country was founded teach us to be tolerant and compassionate, but they don’t tell us to abandon common sense. If we hope to change this corrosive course, we have to start by acknowledging a simple fact: The human species populated the world and created a civilization, for better or worse, through the union of man and woman. That was no accident. It was by design.” —Peter Lemiska

“It’s one thing to try to attract voters. It’s another thing to do so by demonizing others and propagating lies from the pits of hell. Ultimately, we must engage and defeat the transgender industrialists no matter how loudly they shriek.” —Douglas Andrews

A Broken Clock Is Right Twice a Day

“I’m a woman. Please don’t ever refer to me as a person with a uterus, birthing person, or person who menstruates. How do people not realize how degrading this is? You can support the transgender community without doing this sh*t.” —"The Young Turks" co-host Ana Kasparian

Political Futures

“Democrats are going to sink $50 million into ballot harvesting operations in Pennsylvania and Arizona. Without a GOP plan to counter that, your Trump vs. DeSantis arguments are pretty much pointless. Cause we aren’t winning the White House.” —Jesse Kelly

The BIG Lies

“Extreme MAGA Republicans don’t want the children of America to learn about the Holocaust.” —House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries (D-NY)

“When we look at how strong the economy is, it’s because of the president’s work.” —White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre

Hot Air

“Our transportation systems … cope with profoundly disruptive forces that include … increasing threats from climate change.” —Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg

“There’s no ban on gas stoves. I have a gas stove. It is just about making the existing electric and gas stoves — and all the other appliances — more efficient.” —Energy Secretary Jennifer Granholm

Demagogues

“Students being murdered at their desks is not enough for [Republicans] to value lives over toys. … They don’t want commonsense regulations on gun ownership. Their perverted view of the Second Amendment compels them to argue against reasonable restrictions. … We will not succumb to the nihilist, insurrectionist view of the Second Amendment.” —Congresswoman Cori Bush (D-MO)

“When we talk about progressive values, I can say what my progressive value is, and that is freedom over fascism.” —Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY)

“I just realized something — Republicans ain’t got no swag. That’s why they want to ban TikTok.” —Congressman Jamaal Bowman (D-NY)

Veep Thoughts

“During Women’s History Month, we celebrate and we honor the women who made history throughout history.” —Kamala Harris