Columnist.
When we have wronged someone it is often a great challenge to humble ourselves, say, “I’m sorry” and ask for their forgiveness. But, more often than not, the greatest challenge for most people is to do the forgiving. When a friend or family member who has caused harm comes to us with a broken heart and sincere sorrow, most decent people manage to muster up compassion and accept the apology. The real challenge arises when the deep wounds caused by another are not followed by remorse or an offer of restoration. These are literally the "times that try men's souls." And they are the exact circumstances in which our forgiveness is needed most.
Three summers ago I witnessed the dancing eyes and exuberant smiles of fellow humans who were tasting freedom for the very first time. I was on a Florida barrier island when some three dozen very lucky Cubans escaped their captors, beat the odds in dangerous seas, and finally stepped into freedom on America’s shore. It seemed that they came from another time – almost like characters from an old black-and-white movie about war and oppression. As I processed what I was witnessing, I began to realize that they were flesh-and-blood representatives of millions like them who have suffered in the clutches of communist regimes. From the Soviet Gulags, to China’s Tiananmen Square, to North Korea, to the tiny island of Cuba and other places in-between, 100 million men, women and children around the world have been victimized by communist thugs. Just 90 miles from our own border a third generation of Cuban people remains captive to the same brutal regime that terrorized their grandparents.
The ugly face of female oppression is all around us. But the source might surprise you. Females are favored on college campuses for scholarships and sports, so it's not educational opportunity that we lack. In fact, female co-eds now dominate universities in both numbers and in special programs available to them. With plenty of government grants for businesses run by women, we've got advantages there too. And there are innumerable labor laws that protect women in the workforce from discrimination. It's obviously not the modern American male that is oppressing women. A growing majority of men are so careful not to offend that many of them don't even open doors or compliment women anymore. Many men are scared to treat women like ladies - let alone deny them opportunity - for fear that the bitter voice of feminism will rise up and call them bigots.
No one wants to talk about America's growing addiction to pornography. Certainly not me, but I do quite often because I know it is one of the greatest evils of our day. Like a toxic plague, pornography usage is sweeping our nation and destroying our humanity. Tragically, the largest demographic consuming internet pornography is children between the ages of 12 and 17. As deadly as pornography is to the innocence and development of our children, it has a stranglehold on millions of men too. Walk by any magazine stand and you’ll see that although porn is difficult to avoid on the internet, “dirty magazines” are still a much sought-after commodity by adult males. While in the airport recently my heart broke at the site of so many men who spend time between flights thumbing through the pages of “soft porn” publications like Playboy. And for crying out loud, they shamelessly do so in their tidy suits in the plain site of everyone. It will probably shock many of you to hear that these “gentlemen’s magazines” have for years featured photos, cartoons and illustrations of children in sexual situations, including association with adults, animals, and sexual assault. So much for “soft porn”.
It still stuns me when people of great privilege and position choose to behave like spoiled children. You’ve seen it a million times as have I – the boss going out of his way to humiliate an employee with a public criticism; the teacher who purposely degrades a little kid in class; the politician who arrogantly dismisses the opinions of his dedicated staff and the very people he is supposed to represent. Sadly, this week we saw two of sports greatest stars display the worst of behavior while the whole world watched. When Michael Jordan was given basketball’s highest honor and celebrated with a tribute worthy of a king, he berated and belittled person after person in his acceptance speech. When Serena Williams suffered a bad call from a line judge, she lost both the match and her dignity as she pitched a fit, complete with the “f” word and threats of bodily harm.
Every time I write about how the modern culture seems dead-set on destroying the confidence of America's little boys, I am swamped with e-mail. It seems that everyone with a son or grandson has a story to tell about how manhood and chivalry are under attack. Last week I heard from a dad, Bill, who echoes the sentiments of many: "The boys are getting emasculated and wimpy/passive as they're now intimidated by girls due to fear of sex harassment charges and pro-female/anti male societal/educational tilts." Sadly, he's right. As a mom of two sons and a youth leader I have seen how boys cringe when television shows depict boys as crude and stupid while the girls are always smart and powerful. I've experienced their confusion when girls snub them for opening the door. One day I observed the pained looks on the faces of male highschool students when a teacher explained that a major assignment would be to watch a movie of their choice and write a paper on how women in the film are discriminated against.
Recently I wrote about the trend in public schools to push an "if it feels good, do it" brand of sex education on our kids. Those who write the "health education" curriculum, oversee the lesson plans and have the greatest authority in education believe that there are no taboos, and no boundaries on a teenager's sex life. That they actually believe teens should engage in sex at all should be enough to cause outrage - but it goes much further than that. Dr. Miriam Grossman's new book, "You're Teaching My Child What?" documents how they seek to shape an entire generation's world view to support and advance a free sex mentality that would shock even a "free love" child of the radical 60's.
I'll always remember how magical it was to see Tinker Bell flitter across the TV screen. She would touch the top of Cinderella's Castle with her magic wand and release a million tiny sparkles that cascaded down the television screen and seemingly into my living room. Since our family normally attended church on Sunday evenings, it was a rare treat to watch the Wonderful World of Disney. On that occasion when I was home and could steal away and turn on the TV, I was instantly transported into a world of fairytales and dreams. Disney was synonymous with innocence, happiness and hope - of Mickey Mouse, virtuous damsels and handsome heroes.
Moms everywhere are aghast at teen idol Miley Cyrus' recent pole dancing and exaltation of Britney Spears as her hero. The "Hannah Montana" superstar morphed overnight from a bubbly starlet into just another trashy singer, leaving moms feeling betrayed. Many thought they had finally found a " Hollywood type" their daughters could look up to. I visited a friend last year and marveled at the wall-to-wall posters of Hannah Montana that adorned her ten-year-old daughter's room. Like millions of other little girls, Hannah was her hero. From her clothes, music, and dance moves to her hairstyle, this little girl (and her mom) were really "into" Hannah.
Much of what is being taught to our young girls and boys in sex ed classes is too graphic and vulgar to be quoted in the newspaper. You can blame Planned Parenthood, Advocates for Youth, and the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States (SIECUS). These groups, which advocate homosexuality and sado-masochism -- and which instruct girls how to perform oral sex on their boyfriends and other girls -- dominate the content of sex ed. Their materials promote a radical political agenda, are highly pornographic, encourage our children to be sexually active, and are largely devoid of biological and medical information.
