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May 29, 2025

Biden, Macron Team Up to Form Support Group for Battered and Abused World Leaders

“We’re going to help people. No, I’m serious. Not a joke, man. Think about it. My flimgizzdle has a chicken on the gribble, Jack.”

WORLD — Joe Biden has found a new purpose in his post-presidential years, having formed a new support group for battered and abused world leaders with French President Emmanuel Macron.

“I am a battered world leader and I want to help other world leaders know that that’s okay,” Macron said. “It’s not your fault.”

The idea to put together a formal support group was born out of a phone conversation after Macron’s humiliating beat-down by his wife Brigitte. Macron reportedly reached out to Biden, another abused politician, to gauge his interest.

“Hot dog, Macron! That’s the most swell idea I’ve heard since that time that clean young negro boy Obama told me to run for President,” Biden reportedly said during the phone call. “We’re going to help people. No, I’m serious. Not a joke, man. Think about it. My flimgizzdle has a chicken on the gribble, Jack.”

Though their membership is officially anonymous, rumors persist that membership also includes politicians such as former President Bill Clinton, John Fetterman, Prime Minister Keir Starmer, and Trudeau’s replacement, Mark Carney.

At publishing time, the weekly support group meeting had been canceled as Macron was in the hospital with more injuries to his face.

From our friends at The Babylon Bee.

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