Swampthink

“You’re reading the wrong polls.” —Joe Biden when asked, “Why are you losing to Trump in the polls?”

Pot Calling the Kettle Black

“The Republicans have never gotten immigration right. That’s just the fact of it. There’s not very much that the Republicans get right in general.” —Congresswoman Jasmine Crockett (D-TX)

The BIG Lie

“[Republicans are] continuing to defund border security.” —Jasmine Crockett

Braying Jennies

“To basically say that issues of national security as it relates to how we’re going to take care of allies should be tied to this mangled immigration process is absolutely insane.” —Jasmine Crockett

“When you look at somebody like Greg Abbot, my governor … his solution is to basically say, ‘Hey, we’re gonna kill people that are trying to come in.’” —Jasmine Crockett

“We’ve got this situation here where Speaker [Mike] Johnson is not somebody who has seriousness of purpose. … When you pull out 40,000 feet, you see someone that is essentially doing Putin’s bidding.” —Congresswoman Becca Balint (D-VT)

“[Republicans] have not one thing that they offer as a solution other than privatizing or voucherising schools, which is about undermining democracy and undermining civil discourse and undermining pluralism.” —American Federation of Teachers (AFT) Randi Weingarten

Circling the Wagons

“The Republican attempt is to distract from the fact that Republicans have no agenda for the American people. In fact, they are trying to take away freedoms, protections, and rights for the American people. … The House Republicans have no basis of evidence to bring this impeachment. In fact, their own people who testified in the hearings could not state with any evidence why they were bringing this impeachment inquiry against President Biden.” —Congressman Steven Horsford (D-NV)

“It’s just perverse to me that Republicans are weaponizing [Hunter Biden’s] addiction because they’ve never accepted his father, Joe Biden, as president. … There’s no dot to connect between his own personal issues with finances and then-Vice President Joe Biden.” —Congressman Eric Swalwell (D-CA)

Friendly Fire

“If you’re sitting in the White House right now, you’re like: ‘Please, Hunter Biden, we know your dad loves you. Please stop talking in public.’ … The White House would like him to probably go away right now.” —former White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki

Spin Doctors

“We’re on the right path. We’ve got more work to do, but we must stay the course, OK?” —Council of Economic Advisers Chair Jared Bernstein

“Continue to implement the policies that we’ve been talking about thus far — bringing down costs. We talked about some key areas: groceries, I’ve talked about gas, talked about some of the items that are important around the holidays. … We’re getting it done now.” —Jared Bernstein (“Food prices remain up 20.3%, gas prices remain up ~30%, and overall prices remain up 17.4% from when Biden took office.” —RNC)

“We need to make sure that … some in the media, instead of covering what type of shoes Joe Biden has on for the day, to actually cover the work that’s being done.” —DNC Chair Jaime Harrison

Veep Thoughts

“We all watched the television coverage of just yesterday. That’s on top of everything else that we know and don’t know yet, based on what we’ve just been able to see. And because we’ve seen it or not doesn’t mean it hasn’t happened, but just limited to what we have seen.” —Kamala Harris

Yellow Journalism

“Senate staffer alleged by conservative outlets to have had sex in a hearing room is no longer employed.” —NBC News (“The Democrat propagandists over at NBC say the real story of this ‘alleged’ Senate tryst is that ‘conservative outlets’ are just pushing a political agenda. Remember, that’s after the guy did the deed, posted the video, admitted to it, and was fired for it.” —Nate Jackson)

And Last…

“Democrat deviancy is no longer confined to the bedroom but infects the very halls of government, along with almost literally everywhere else because these narcissists can’t seem to abide a world that isn’t enthralled with them 24/7/365. How very sick and sad.” —Nate Jackson