Stolen Valor

“[Tim] Walz [is] a veteran of Operation Enduring Freedom.” —2006 campaign press release

“I’m a retired Command Sergeant Major.” —Tim Walz, 2006 (“He did briefly hold that rank but his rank was then officially reduced to Master Sergeant.” —Mark Alexander)

Praetorian Guard

“JD Vance as a messenger on this may be an imperfect messenger. Because … ‘Combat Correspondent’ … was what his title was. But when you dig a little deeper into that, he was a public affairs specialist. Someone who did not see combat, which certainly the title ‘Combat Correspondent’ kind of gives you a different impression.” —CNN’s Brianna Keilar (“This is disgusting, and you and your entire network should be ashamed of yourselves. When I got the call to go to Iraq, I went. Tim Walz said he carried a gun in a war. Did he? No. It was a lie.” —JD Vance)

Dumb & Dumber

“Has JD Vance been in combat?” —Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi (D-CA)

“I’m not aware of any military service that JD Vance has ever served.” —Senator Tina Smith (D-MN)

Gaslighting

“The Trump campaign is criticizing Gov. Tim Walz for supplying free tampons in schools. But advocates say it’s essential for many students.” —CBS News (“The Trump campaign is criticizing Gov. Tim Walz for supplying free tampons in schools for boys.” There, we fixed it.)

Who Wants to Tell Her?

“We believe in a future where we lower the cost of living for America’s families.” —Kamala Harris

Belly Laughs of the Day

“Vice President Harris is picking a uniter for not just the Democratic Party but for the entire United States.” —Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY)

“We’re the party, you see, that actually believes in law and order and the separation of powers and courts doing what they’re supposed to do and making sure that nobody is above the law.” —Harris-Walz campaign co-chair Mitch Landrieu

For the Record

“What should Harris’ [VP] pick tell us, in the end? That she’s a radical, and that she’s a coward. That she will always, when given the opportunity, side with the most extreme in her party — and that she is afraid enough of them that she’s willing to engage in the most cynical bigotry in order to curry their favor. That’s the kind of person who certainly should not be president of the United States.” —Ben Shapiro

And Last…

“[Cori Bush] surely won’t be the last progressive insurgent to rise up to shame her own party, but it’s good to see her joining Jamaal Bowman in forced retirement.” —National Review