Belly Laughs of the Week

“I don’t know that anybody should be satisfied. This is a terrible moment for our country to have a former president accused of these terribly important crimes. The only satisfaction may be that the system is working.” —Hillary Clinton

“A lot of people in our country don’t even know what [Joe Biden has] done. And part of that is they don’t get their news from MSNBC, they get their news from social media, if they get any news at all. They don’t have the kind of information that would give them confidence in knowing what their government is doing.” —Hillary Clinton

Non Compos Mentis

“No. No comment.” —Joe Biden when asked, “Any comment on the rising death toll in Maui?”

The BIG Lies

“A lot of you were with me when I was in Pittsburgh. … More bridges in Pittsburgh than any other city in America. I watched that bridge collapse. I got there and saw it collapse with over 200 feet off the ground, going over a valley.” —Joe Biden

“A higher percentage of American workers are working today than ever before.” —Joe Biden

“In case you haven’t noticed, inflation is down too and it’s going lower.” —Joe Biden

“Wages are growing faster than inflation.” —Joe Biden

“Inflation is down and wages are up.” —Kamala Harris

“Most Americans feel good about their own economic situation.” —Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen

“We’re now starting to see the impact of … all of this historic legislation the president managed to get passed, the impact of Bidenomics taking root.” —Principle Deputy Press Secretary Olivia Dalton

“We have seen [Biden’s] border plan management be effective.” —White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre

For the Record

“According to [Eric] Adams, New York City ‘is being destroyed by the migrant crisis.’ There you have it — immigration, in and of itself, has the power to bring a great city to its knees.” —Rich Lowry

Observations

“The raw number of suicides last year exceeds the number of Americans who died in the Korean War and the 46,233 who were killed in action or died of wounds during the Vietnam War — a conflict that lasted nearly a decade. Suicide is one of our nation’s deadliest enemies.” —Daniel McCarthy

“According to CBS, 18 million Americans think the ‘use of force’ would be justified to restore Trump to the presidency. Meanwhile, 30 million Americans are okay with using force to prevent Trump from being president. Trump Derangement Syndrome is really quite something.” —Nate Jackson

Tongue-in-Cheek

“I agree with [Hunter Biden attorney Abbe Lowell]. When my children fleece foreign figures for millions, I always call in and say, ‘hello.’ It’s what a father does.” —Jonathan Turley