Non Compos Mentis

“We have all held ourselves accountable for the progress of the withdrawal.” —National Security Council spokesman John Kirby regarding Biden and Harris’s surrender and retreat from Afghanistan

“Ending wars is more difficult than starting them. … But it doesn’t mean that the decision to end this one was wrong or that the withdrawal wasn’t conducted as professionally and as bravely as was humanly possible given the circumstances.” —John Kirby

The BIG Lies

“Vice President Harris was never in charge of immigration policy … and was certainly not the border czar.” —Congressman Jerry Nalder (D-NY)

“I believe in security. I want barriers on our southern border at every place it makes sense. I don’t want anyone to come into our country if we don’t know who they are.” —Congressman Eric Swalwell (D-CA)

Theater of the Absurd

“I think she’s been crystal clear on her values, what she wants to fight for, and how she will do it. And also, you know — she talks to people.” —Secretary of Commerce Gina Raimondo regarding Kamala Harris

Belly Laugh of the Day

“The [debate] challenge for the vice president is really twofold. One, sometimes knowing the facts too well gets in the way of giving the broader vision. … But the other challenge is the bar for her is so much higher because the bar for Trump is so low.” —Congressman Adam Schiff (D-CA)

For the Record

“It’s not only voters who think Harris is too far left; the vice president herself agrees. That’s why she’s running like a wannabe Republican, even welcoming support from Liz and Dick Cheney.” —Daniel McCarthy

“‘My values never changed.’ Killshot: ‘We know. That’s the problem.’” —Scott Adams