For the first time in what feels like an eternity, President Joe Biden and former President Donald Trump will return to the debate stage this Thursday in one of two televised showdowns documenting the fiercest fight between a 78-year-old and 81-year-old outside of a Florida Denny’s.

While Trump has maintained his trademark campaign energy with rallies across the country, Biden has isolated himself at Camp David, presumably to receive a week-long dose of intravenous magic beans to ensure an energetic start to the debate.

At a glance, this debate feels like it should be over already.

But, despite what seems like an ever-growing list of reasons to vote for literally anyone else other than Biden — including economic collapse, chaos at the border and a world on fire — Trump fans need to realize that his victory is far from a foregone conclusion. With that in mind, here are three things the former president must do to ensure that he relegates the current president back to where he belongs: a nice warm armchair within shuffling distance of a well-stocked fridge, a television with large subtitles and an accessible toilet.

First, the Trump of 2016 needs to return.

Trump’s debate performance in 2016 was, frankly, perfect. He was poised, controlled and — when necessary — brutal. He reversed accusations of tax impropriety as proof of his business acumen. He brought Hillary Clinton’s various scandals to light through humor, with her infamous emails being a particular highlight. And his “because you’d be in jail” retort was the final nail in Clinton’s campaign coffin.

In 2016, Trump managed to focus all of his strengths in what was a meticulous takedown of Clinton. In 2020, however, too many of Trump’s weaknesses were on full display. He was abrasive, undisciplined and careless, allowing the media to rally behind Biden and hide what were his obvious flaws, even then.

If the Trump of 2016 shows up on Thursday evening, Biden is toast. If the Trump of 2020 shows up, Biden will stand a chance … if he’s able to stand at all.

Second, Trump needs to thread the needle of taking on Biden and the media.

It’s obvious that holding the debate on CNN — one of many propaganda outlets for the Democratic Party — is a disadvantage for any Republican candidate, let alone Trump. It’s also obvious that CNN is overly sensitive toward even meager criticism of its untouchable personalities — for example, CNN’s Kasie Hunt cut short an interview with Trump spokeswoman Karoline Leavitt after she dared to call Jake Tapper (trigger warning) biased.

But the media’s obvious partisanship on all matters can be turned into an advantage if Trump manages to debate Biden while forcing this reality into the forefront of the nation’s psyche. Trump should look to Florida’s Gov. Ron DeSantis for inspiration and control the debate not by falling for the bait they’ll throw out for him, but rejecting every subjective premise and steering the conversation back to what actually matters. It might be tempting to dive head-first into a toe-to-toe fight with the media, but they’re not the enemy. They’re just in the enemy’s corner.

Third, Trump needs to make it all about Biden.

Unfortunately, the reality of presidential elections in recent years is that the candidate who emerges victorious is the candidate who avoids the attention of the electorate.

2016 was a referendum on Hillary Clinton, the nation’s Disney villain. She lost. 2020 was a referendum on Trump, the nation’s pantomime villain. He lost. In 2024, all the pieces are in place to cast Joe Biden as the real-life villain he obviously is. All Trump needs to do is sit back, point at his opponent, and list off every single reason why the country would be certifiably insane to reelect Biden. Make 2024 a referendum on Biden, and Biden loses.

If Trump manages these three objectives, it’s hard to imagine a scenario in which he doesn’t emerge victorious, giving the majority of Americans who don’t rely on social media an insight into what should be an obvious choice: Trump and his undeniable quirks; or Biden, his monumental flaws, his disastrous policies and his long-absent brain.

A joke about requiring drug-testing couldn’t hurt, either …

COPYRIGHT 2024 CREATORS.COM