From The Comedy Store
Mayor Rahm Emanuel welcomed a thousand illegal kids who were transferred from the Texas border to Chicago. What an Odyssey. The children were fleeing revolution, drug wars and random shootings, and that was just from the Chicago bus station to the mayor’s reception.
Mayor Rahm Emanuel welcomed a thousand illegal kids who were transferred from the Texas border to Chicago. What an Odyssey. The children were fleeing revolution, drug wars and random shootings, and that was just from the Chicago bus station to the mayor’s reception.
Chicago Police Chief Garry McCarthy was on the hot seat over three-hundred-fifty shootings and forty-seven murders in Chicago so far this year. And it just never ends. Chicago is the city where U.S. Secretaries of State train to arrange all their cease-fires in the Middle East.
The New York Post reports the Kennedy family invited Senator Elizabeth Warren to their Hyannisport compound to urge her to run for president. She’s an opponent of Wall Street, big banks and capitalism in general. She may run for president under her Indian name, Dances with Marxism.
President Obama vowed to act alone on illegal immigration if Congress refuses to pass a reform bill. For hundreds of miles the U.S. border is guarded by video cameras and electronic sensors. So Congress spent two billion dollars to give us the same security they have at The Gap.
The CDC reported major progress of the two Ebola-infected American doctors back from Africa. They were given a serum made from tobacco. Imagine Obama’s joy when the Secret Service ordered him to smoke while the African leaders were in Washington.
Obama hosted a banquet at the White House for fifty African nation leaders. They are well aware of the challenges he faces at home. Obama’s job approval rating is so low that people in Kenya now claim that he was born in the United States.
Obama made great progress at the African Leaders Summit. The leaders met together and discussed the importance of representative government, the rule of law, and secure borders. After much debate, President Obama agreed to try things their way.
Joe Biden goofed again while he was speaking at the African Leaders Summit at the White House. During his speech, Joe repeatedly assured African leaders of U.S. support for the nation of Africa. Every time that Joe Biden loses his train of thought, there are no survivors.
John Kerry was ripped for bringing Israel’s enemies Qatar and Turkey into the cease-fire talks between Israel and Hamas. It’s hard to understand why Israel is suspicious. Hamas is calling for death to all Jews and John Kerry’s just trying to get the Israelis to meet them halfway.
Russian troops and armor massed on the border of eastern Ukraine, appearing set to invade Ukraine for the pro-Russian rebels. The U.S. offered no arms to Kiev to resist the invasion. The Weather Channel just reported that the five-day forecast for Ukraine is two days.
The Anne Frank Museum in Holland revealed its guest book on the seventieth anniversary of her arrest. Justin Bieber wrote that he hoped she’d have been a Belieber. The fact that millions of people were following an idiot is why she was hiding in the attic in the first place.
Obama turned fifty-four years old in the White House but he decided not to have any birthday party. At least, that’s what they told Joe Biden. To celebrate his birthday, the president forged a Kenyan birth certificate to get himself out of this miserable job.
U.S. Congresswoman Julie Brownley of Los Angeles sent out a patriotic flyer to her district with a photo of a woman in military uniform. Unfortunately it turned out to be the uniform of the German Luftwaffe. Now three synagogues in her district want the Iron Dome installed on their roofs and local schools are dealing with an influx of unaccompanied children from Poland.
© Copyright 2014 Argus Hamilton
