Burt Prelutsky / September 11, 2021

The Dogs of War

Four hundred military service dogs were left at the Kabul Airport.

Knowing how I feel about dogs, I’m sure you understand how disgusted I am with my government over the 400 military service dogs who were already in their cages waiting to be transported being left at the Kabul Airport.

The fact that in their stead we flew out thousands of Afghans, most of whom did not assist our troops and many of whom wish to attack us from within, leaves me furious.

Further embarrassing the United States, it was an English member of the Royal Marines, Pen Farthing, who stepped forward and managed to rescue 200 dogs and cats from Afghanistan.

But then, if we had made a priority of flying the four-legged hostages to freedom, they couldn’t be used to flip certain red states the way the two-legged Islamic mongrels can be relied on to do.

I have tried to figure out why the dogs were left behind to suffer. I wound up wondering if it was because the Afghan passengers on the plane objected to their presence. I’m sure we all remember the kerfuffle when Muslim taxi drivers in New York City refused to pick up passengers who were accompanied by dogs, even if those dogs were those of the seeing eye variety.

I am certain that the American crew members of the C-17 cargo planes would have preferred flying the dogs to freedom if they’d had any say in the matter.

Speaking of dogs, metaphorically that is, it was revolting to see Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin and head of the Chiefs of Staff Gen. Mark Milley, congratulating each other over the success of the evacuation. Anyone who isn’t scared silly by having two such powerful individuals showing such blatant signs of delusion simply hasn’t been paying attention.


In a related story, the Alexandria (VA) Health Department sent out a request for Pashto/Dari speakers to assist with translation support for recent arrivals. So, apparently, none of the thousands of new Americans are the heroic translators we’ve been hearing so much about. Apparently, those were the ones we left behind with the dogs to fend for themselves.


As you have probably heard, the Supreme Court refused to overthrow the Texas law that bans abortions after a fetal heartbeat can be detected.

Over at CBS, in reporting the news, they referred to the “so-called fetal heartbeat.” They didn’t bother explaining “so-called,” because they know that most of their viewers agree that an embryo is only a so-called human being. It only becomes a viable entity if and when the so-called mother and the so-called doctor decide to let it be born, at least so long as they have high expectations that it will grow up to vote for Democrats.

Not to be outdone by CBS, at CNN, they were referring to Christians who support the Texas law as “the American Taliban.”


It appears that I am on a roll when it comes to offending people. Because August is sign-up month for my articles, I tend to send out reminders two or three times over the final two weeks when I don’t hear from people.

One of the people I hadn’t heard from is the son-in-law of a friend of mine. So when my friend, whom we’ll call John because his name is John, and I got together for lunch, I asked him why I hadn’t heard back. He said that his son-in-law had complained to him about my nagging him.

That annoyed me, as you might imagine. Instead of whining to his father-in-law, all he needed to do was let me know he wasn’t renewing his subscription. It would have taken him five seconds to send me an email. I wouldn’t have been angry. But I would have been able to scratch his name off the list.

A few days later, I got an email from my now erstwhile friend saying he never wanted to have lunch with me again because I had been intemperate in my remarks about his relative.

I let him know that if I was angry, it was because I was angrier with him than I was with the young man. Why, I asked, had it never occurred to him to suggest that the schmuck reply to one of my emails?

Instead, he adopted the role of an innocent bystander who then got to pass judgment on my boorish behavior.

As you see, I’ve been running through friends (Frank, Myron, John) at a record pace. If this continues much longer, even I won’t want to have lunch with me.


The ACLU, which was always a left-wing organization but sometimes came out on the side of the Constitution, has lost its collective mind over the past few years.

In its most recent pronouncement, they insisted that “Far from compromising civil liberties, vaccine mandates actually further them.”

Naturally, they didn’t bother explaining how denying people the right to choose what they allow to be shot into their bodies, which sounds at least a little fascistic, was increasing our freedoms.

If it reminds people of George Orwell’s “1984,” it should. In that dystopian society, up was down, black was white and, if Orwell had conceived of such madness, no doubt men could have gotten pregnant if the dictator, Big Brother, said they could.


Four women and a female minor complained, to no avail, about a man claiming to be a woman walking around naked at the Wi Spa. The management, no doubt fearing a lawsuit or a picket line of LGBTQRSTUVWXYZ crazies driving customers away, refused to do anything about it.

In their complaint, the ladies were pretty specific about the offense, describing the loon as in a state of “partial erection.”

Perhaps, I found myself thinking, it only appeared that way because he was on the verge of giving birth.

The degenerate, Darren Agee Merager, who identifies as a woman, was subsequently arrested for indecent exposure and was found to have committed a number of sexual offenses, which landed him on California’s registry of sex offenders.

But in the meantime, the loony sex activists made life miserable for the ladies who had reported him.

In a sane society, belonging to the LGBTQ, etc., community would be understood to be a sure sign of mental defectiveness. These days, they constitute a powerful voting bloc.


The evacuation from Afghanistan was such a bloody debacle, with no end in sight, that it’s difficult to lay blame on any specific group or individual. Even Joe Biden claimed he’d listened to the folks at the Pentagon, the State Department and our spies on the ground.

Still, his was the final decision, and he was the idiot trying to read his lines off the Teleprompter, bragging about getting 90% of the Americans out of harm’s way, after vowing mere days earlier not to leave a single American behind.

But I can’t help feeling that perhaps if the CIA hadn’t been spending so much time snooping into Tucker Carlson’s phone calls, perhaps they would have had an inkling that the Afghan troops weren’t even as steadfast as tin soldiers and that President Ashraf Ghani had packed his shirts, shorts and a few hundred million of our tax dollars in his steamer trunk and was on his way to the airport.


People kept talking about quagmires when we got involved in Vietnam. It made sense because Vietnam was a humid, soggy country, where actual quagmires are a part of the terrain.

But our government has found a way to create quagmires in places where none have ever existed.

If we ever have reason to go to war in the Middle East in the future, and we don’t employ nuclear bombs, you will know it’s at the behest of the military-industrial complex and has nothing to do with our national security.


My man in Australia, Dennis Stockton, passed along a joke that has them rolling in the aisles down under. Like Fox News, I report, you decide.

Two men are seated next to each other on a train. One of the men pulls out his phone to show the other a picture of his girlfriend. “Isn’t she beautiful?” he asks.

The second man replies: “If you think she’s beautiful, you should see my wife.”

“Oh, really? Is she a stunner, too?”

“No, mate, she’s an optician.”


You can email Burt directly at [email protected]

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