Theater of the Absurd

“If they wanna think to take on government if we get out of line, which they’re talking again about, guess what? They need F-15s. They don’t need a rifle.” —Joe Biden

Victimitis

“The Justice Department is under attack like never before. … We will not be intimidated by these attacks. But it is absurd and dangerous that public servants, many of whom risk their lives every day, are being threatened for simply doing their jobs and adhering to the principles that have long guided the Justice Department’s work.” —Attorney General Merrick Garland

“Continued unfounded attacks against the Justice Department’s employees are dangerous for people’s safety. They are dangerous for our democracy. This must stop.” —Merrick Garland

For the Record

“The crime is simple … Hunter Biden tried to get a gun in violation of laws that protect the public against people like him.” —Christine Flowers

“When someone embraces a chemical regardless of the consequences, it’s not enough to say that they need ‘help.’ Sure, they need help, and in this society there are numerous ways to obtain it. But that does not mean that the privileged son of the current president gets to avoid the consequences of his actions. … When someone lies on a form to buy a gun, we don’t get to smile mournfully and nod our heads as we hear about his ‘struggle.’” —Christine Flowers

Tip of the Iceberg

“Hunter is a convicted felon in the gun charge, but his most serious crimes are money laundering and selling out his country to China, which directly implicate his father Joe — so those charges will never be brought.” —Buck Sexton

Can’t Fix Stupid…

“Hunter Biden’s conviction shows there’s not a two-tier system of justice.” —Washington Post editorial board

The BIG Lie I

“The Justice Department makes decisions about criminal investigations based only on the facts and the law. We do not investigate people because of their last name, their political affiliation, the size of their bank account, where they come from or what they look like.” —Merrick Garland

The BIG Lie II

“[Republicans] are all ghosts in new garments trying to take us back. … Taking away your freedoms. Making it harder for black people to vote or have your vote counted. Closing doors of opportunity. Attacking the values of diversity, equity, and inclusion. If you can believe it, banning books about black experience in America. Trying to erase and rewrite history.” —Joe Biden

Non Compos Mentis

“Who in God’s name needs a magazine that can hold 200 shells?” —Joe Biden

“Since the founding of our ideals that we don’t know fully what American soil is.” —Joe Biden

“She know long! She knew suhlongasuhijeruhhnied, our freedom can never be secured.” —Joe Biden

Friendly Fire

“I thought that President Biden should not run for reelection.” —Democrat strategist James Carville

Race Bait

“Accusations and false accusations of anti-Semitism are wielded against people of color … by bath-faith political actors.” —Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY)

Lipstick on a Pig

“As long as the Biden administration refuses to provide any type of enforcement, any type of blockage of people crossing illegally, all that this new Biden policy is going to do is to actually attract and invite even more people to cross the border illegally.” —Texas Governor Greg Abbott

“This is gaslighting our fellow Americans. When Biden gets up and says, ‘This is going to stop people from coming across the border,’ when he says, ‘It’s going to secure the border,’ in fact, it is making … illegal crossings worse.” —Greg Abbott

Re: The Left

“In America, the old idea of a melting pot that created something uniquely American has been cast aside in favor of the mosaic — a culture in which countless identity groups vie for attention and keep score of their grievances.” —Nate Jackson

“The left would rather permanently torch the credibility of society’s institutions than admit the obvious. It’s why conservative conspiracy theories keep coming true.” —Victor Joecks

“Trust in the media is at a near record low. They won’t do anything to elevate the trust level because they are prisoners of their own ideology.” —Cal Thomas