Freudian Slip?

“Our audience is about to see the frantic seconds in the moments after the government tried to kill former President Trump” —ABC News’s Pierre Thomas

“You Ain’t Black” Moment

“Given the, just, stratospheric entrance of Vice President Kamala Harris into the presidential campaign … you’re going to look real crazy being on the other side of that line, particularly as a person of color, but really as anyone who claims to have any connection to the culture.” —MSNBC’s Joy Reid

Belly Laugh of the Day

“Vice President Harris is one of the most qualified people to run in decades.” —Senator Elizabeth Warren (D-MA)

Praetorian Guard

“The Trump campaign and Republicans have tagged Harris repeatedly with the ‘border czar’ title — which she never actually had.” —Axios (“Harris, appointed by Biden as border czar, said she would be looking at the ‘root causes’ that drive migration.” —Axios, April 2021)

Political Futures

“There’s a reason Harris rose in the [2020] race and a reason she fell. The short version is that, for Democratic voters, Harris seemed appealing when she first started her campaign, and then they liked her less and less as they got to know her. Familiarity with the candidate killed her hopes.” —Byron York

Delusions of Grandeur

“We are all deeply, deeply grateful for [Biden’s] service.” —Kamala Harris (Which must be why Harris and her fellow Democrats engaged in a coup.)

Baghdad Bob

“What we saw from this president the last couple of days was a human decency, a good man, someone who decided not to put himself first, like we’ve seen before, but to put the American people first and this country first.” —White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre

Shots/Chasers

“[Joe Biden’s] selfless act this weekend reminds me of what George Washington did when he voluntarily gave up reelection and put country first.” —Congressman Ted Lieu (D-CA)

“Like our first president, Joe Biden recognizes that the presidency is not about one person, or one party.” —Senator Angus King (I-ME)

“Only three presidents before Joe Biden have made this decision that, though I can run again, I’m choosing not to run again — George Washington, President Polk, and LBJ.” —Senator Tim Kaine (D-VA)

“He gets to go out as the George Washington of his party.” —NPR’s Mara Liasson

“He will be mentioned in the same sentence as George Washington. Why? Because [of] selflessly leaving power.” —NBC News contributor Jonathan Alter

“His decision is … an act of self-sacrifice that places him in the company of George Washington.” —historian Jon Meacham

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“This notion that the media is trying to peddle that [Biden] is like George Washington refusing power for the good of the country — he had no choice! They were knifing him in the back!” —Florida Governor Ron DeSantis

“[George Washington] was adamant that eight years would be his limit. He was still the most highly regarded leader in America and could have had a third term for the asking. … In almost every important way, Washington’s decision was the opposite of Biden’s. Most Americans did not want Biden to run again and did not think he could handle the job. … Who in 2024 believes that with the end of Biden’s presidency America will lose — to quote King George III’s description of Washington — ‘the greatest character of the age’?” —Jeff Jacoby

“[George] Washington feared the politicization of the nation, that it would become everything that Joe Biden now represents. Washington expressed this concern in his farewell address in 1796, saying that ‘unprincipled men will be enabled to subvert the power of the people and to usurp for themselves the reins of government.’ This, of course, is exactly what has happened.” —Star Parker

For the Record

“They didn’t soulfully consider President Joe Biden’s marked decline and decide, for the good of him, his party and the country, that he had to step down. They lied, and they got caught. … The perpetrators of a shameful cover-up want us to move on as if nothing happened, when the stink of their rank deception should dog their candidate and their party the rest of this campaign.” —Rich Lowry

“Democratic Party bosses and money men tossed out 14 million votes in favor of Joe Biden in the primaries because the polls looked bad. It’s that simple.” —Ben Shapiro

The Rainbow Mafia

“I was essentially tricked into signing documents for one of my older boys, Xavier. … And I was told Xavier might commit suicide. … It wasn’t explained to me that puberty blockers are actually just sterilization drugs. I lost my son, essentially. They call it ‘deadnaming’ for a reason. The reason it’s called ‘deadnaming’ is because your son is dead. So my son Xavier is dead, killed by the woke mind virus. So I vowed to destroy the woke mind virus after that.” —Elon Musk