Verbal Gymnastics
“When I was running, a question I would face was: What does it mean to be a democratic socialist? And I only bring that up because I think sometimes there’s a fixation on a definition of something.” —New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani

Letting the Inmates Run the Asylum
“[If] somebody says, ‘I’m a DSA candidate,’ I don’t think you should use that to throw them out. Why would you do that?” —Virginia Senator Tim Kaine

Projection
“The 250th anniversary we were ringing in was an anniversary of defeating exactly the kind of tyranny [Donald Trump] wants to ram down our throats in the form of ICE.” —Michigan Senate candidate Abdul El-Sayed

The BIG Lies
“Last year in Maryland, there was this fellow by the name of Kilmar Ábrego García. He was abducted by Trump’s ICE forces.” —Maryland Senator Chris Van Hollen

“[The] so-called SAVES [sic] Act … is meant to just prevent a number of people from voting, including women who have changed their last name.” —Kentucky Governor Andy Beshear

“[Melania Trump] said, ‘My husband wants people to walk down the street without being raped.’ Give me a f***ing break, Melania. Your husband is the rapist.” —podcaster Jennifer Welch

Race Bait
“There is no question that the Trump-Vance administration is a white supremacist regime.” —Georgia Senator Raphael Warnock

“Economic exploitation … still permeates our society today, built on the fallacies of anti-blackness and white supremacy that I believe exists in the government that is presiding over this country.” —SEIU President April Verrett

Theater of the Absurd
“Caitlin Clark skipped the WNBA Orange Carpet on Thursday, opting to get her hair done in her hometown of Des Moines.” —USA Today

“Clarification: Caitlin Clark was attending an event for the Caitlin Clark Foundation, which is why she missed the WNBA All-Star Weekend Orange Carpet.” —USA Today

Friendly Fire
“We are not going to win the war against some kind of [voter] ID. It doesn’t make any sense. It doesn’t fix anything, but maybe you just go along with it and move to the next thing.” —Democrat strategist James Carville

“Socialism — that should be the unacceptable view in the Democratic Party. We all should be capitalist.” —Pennsylvania Senator John Fetterman

Belly Laugh of the Day
“When I’m gone, you’re all going to be broke. Your business model is going to be finished. … That’s why tonight, to show just how much I care about the press, and I want to save your ratings, I’m pleased to announce my intention … to run for a fourth term as president of the United States. … I won three times. Now I’m going to do it again.” —President Donald Trump at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner (He then put on a “Trump 2028” hat.)

And Last…
“Caution didn’t win women the vote, or equal pay, or fair sport, or the right to single-sex spaces. Sophie Cunningham is standing up for women and girls everywhere and it’s glorious.” —author J.K. Rowling