Spin machine: “Yes, I did support [Trump’s aerial attack on Syria]. … But I am not convinced that it really made much of a difference, and I don’t know what kind of … backroom deals were made with the Russians.” —Hillary Clinton

Vast right-wing conspiracy: “It wasn’t a perfect campaign, there is no such thing. But I was on the way to winning until a combination of Jim Comey’s letter on October 28 and Russian WikiLeaks raised doubts in the minds of people who were inclined to vote for me but got scared off. The evidence for that intervening event is I think is compelling, and persuasive.” —Hillary Clinton, who also asserted, “If the election had been on October 27 I’d be your president”

That’s sexist! “There is an underlying issue with women.” —CNN’s Christiane Amanpour

For the record: “The Clintons have taken victimhood to a new scientific height. They are sort of the experts. The entry in the dictionary should start with them.” —Charles Krauthammer

Alternative facts: “The public knows the government shutdowns are always caused by Republicans. I mean, it’s just fact. Over the last five, 10 years, whenever there’s a shutdown, it’s usually the Tea Party that pushes for it.” —Sen. Sherrod Brown

Non Compos Mentis: “If any those of you that feel like [climate change] is not a problem, I challenge you to go into your car in your garage, start your car, and see what happens there.” —Democrat House candidate Rob Quist (If Quist had put his thinking cap on, he’d know that it’s carbon monoxide, not carbon dioxide, from tailpipes that poses serious health problems. Word of advice: Don’t attempt his challenge.)

And last… “History is littered with the human wreckage of scientific errors married to political power.” —Bret Stephens