Upright: “By the time the bloody world war ended in 1945, more than 400,000 American military men and women had been killed. They proudly fought and honored our flag with their very lives so that you and I could live in peace and freedom. While they endured a hellish nightmare for us, it is beyond shameful that some cannot muster the decency to simply stand in honor of them. … This week as we honor the shattered lives of Pearl Harbor, please take a few minutes to reflect on the entirety of the song that pays tribute to all those who serve.” —Rebecca Hagelin

Non Compos Mentis: “Don’t think [Trump’s Jerusalem decision] isn’t related to Alabama next week. It is related. Because it’s the Christian Evangelicals down there with their crazy ideas about Israel, which is, I don’t know, mythical. They don’t understand the situation over there and how tricky it is ethnically and tribally. They don’t care because it’s a religious belief. Trump’s playing into that this week; you watch him.” —MSNBC’s Chris Matthews

Self-indulger in chief: “As we took [climate] actions, we saw the U.S. economy grow consistently. We saw the longest streak of job creation in American history by far, a streak that still continues by the way. Thanks, Obama.” —Barack Obama

Braying Jenny: “I hope to represent the people of the United States, not the president.” —Olympian Lindsey Vonn

Alpha Jackass: “Just evacuated my house. It’s like Donald Trump is setting the world on fire. Literally and figuratively. Stay safe everyone. Dark times.” —Californian Chelsea Handler

Belly laugh of the week: “Fellow conservatives, it’s time to call on Clarence Thomas to resign.” —Jay Kaganoff in The Washington Post

And last… “Ok, we totally exaggerated and cried ‘wolf’ about Mitt Romney, but this tax bill REALLY WILL KILL PEOPLE AND [TRUMP] IS HITLER!” —Twitter satirist @hale_razor