Excuses, excuses: “I think it was difficult for Hillary Clinton to get by even the macho atmosphere prevailing during that campaign, and she was criticized in a way I think no man would have been criticized. I think anyone who watched that campaign unfold would answer it the same way I did: Yes, sexism played a prominent part.” —Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Demo-gogues: “After I got appointed, I went down to Brooklyn to meet with families who had suffered from gun violence in their communities. And you immediately experience the feeling that I couldn’t have been more wrong. I only had the lens of upstate New York. … I was embarrassed. I was wrong.” —Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand on her evolving stance against firearms

Alpha Jackass: “What’s the over/under that it was just [Vanessa Trump’s] coke dealer dropping off the usual but she did too much & this is a cover story?” —Tara Dublin on this week’s “white substance” scare that sent Vanessa to the hospital

Delusions of grandeur: “Obama’s historic election was a departure from America’s past, but he also embodied the ideals that define some of the other presidents portrayed in these halls: Lincoln’s secular faith in our national union; Kennedy’s commitment to public service; Reagan’s optimism that America’s best days are still to come.” —Smithsonian Institution Secretary David Skorton

Self-inflicted Victimitis: “I don’t want my Olympic experience being about Mike Pence.” —Olympic figure skater Adam Rippon, who volunteered his criticism of Pence and thus made his own Olympic experience what it is

D'oh! “I find it obscene — the term ‘chain migration.’ It is incredibly cruel to those whose ancestors were brought to this country in chains in slavery.” —Sen. Robert Menendez (“Menendez’s comments characterizing the phrase ‘chain migration’ as racist came a month after he jointly released a bipartisan statement with five other lawmakers using the term.” —The Washington Free Beacon)

And last… “Last week: Trump wants a military parade like a dictator! This week: The admirable precision of North Korea’s cheerleaders will warm your heart!” —Twitter satirist @hale_razor