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L. Brent Bozell & Tim Graham / December 25, 2019

Smashing Santa and Jesus for Christmas

The war on Christmas marches on. Secularists — let’s say it: atheists — are leaving no stone unturned.

The war on Christmas marches on. Secularists — let’s say it: atheists — are leaving no stone unturned. Supreme Court Justice Neil Gorsuch said, “Merry Christmas” in an interview on “Fox & Friends.” Leftists pounced, complaining this was a “talking point for the GOP.”

New Rasmussen polls show strong majorities favor saying merry Christmas, celebrating Christmas in public schools and having religious displays in public areas. But those in Hollywood see old-time religion as a relentless nightmare of oppression. Christmas makes them want to tear the roof off of a Nativity set. They vent through the vehicle they know will resonate: entertainment television. Here it is: no-holds-barred hostility, starting with Santa.

On Fox’s “Family Guy,” a shopping mall Santa Claus rocks a high school girl to orgasm on his lap. After she searches all the local malls until she finds her creepy Claus again, this stranger offers her a speech about her new sexual discovery and suggestively tells her, “I know what each and every person needs for Christmas.”

On Comedy Central’s “South Park,” Santa Claus wreaks havoc on the town by banning alcohol (to stop drunk-driving accidents), and then he bans marijuana that had been laced with cocaine (which led to more accidents). So the man making the cocaine-laced pot starts selling pure cocaine, which leads to Santa sneaking into all the homes at night to steal all of it. Finally, a drug dealer convinces Santa to try the cocaine, and Santa marvels at how “clean” it is. Then Jesus appears, and Santa offers him the cocaine. “It’s a good high,” Jesus says in agreement, so he performs a “Christmas miracle,” making the cocaine fall like snow over the town so everyone could enjoy the addictive drugs.

Yes, ‘tis the season to be bigoted. And, yes, the Lord is the target.

Netflix put a sick twist on Christmas movies by streaming a Brazilian comedy called “The First Temptation of Christ” about a homosexual Jesus who goes home for the holidays and introduces the rest of the Holy Family to his flamboyant new boyfriend, Orlando. That’s not enough, apparently. The 46-minute Christmas special also includes a scene with the Virgin Mary smoking a joint, the wise man Melchior hiring a prostitute and Jesus getting high off “special tea.”

Showtime has rebooted the lesbian drama “The L Word,” which, in its last iteration, dreamed of George W. Bush’s mother aborting him before he could become president. On the new series, a lesbian character shocks her lover by coming “out of the closet” to reveal she’s a minister of the (LGBT-oriented) Metropolitan Community Church. The lover is shocked: “You’re, like … married to Jesus, right?” The minister slyly answers: “Yeah, I am. But it’s an open relationship — sexually, I mean.”

It’s sad to say that all of this feels like recycled garbage. No one is thrilled by these shopworn atheist pranks. No news network finds any of this newsworthy. But the networks have found another outrage of interest and leapt on it.

This time it was the Hallmark Channel, perhaps the last safe zone for families who honor Christmas. The LGBT fascists declared war on the network when, during its usual holiday fare, it failed to air an ad for the wedding website Zola that featured lesbians kissing. The networks were completely in sync with their allies in the gay community. The Hallmark surrender came quickly, and everyone cheered.

So, to sum up: Turning Jesus into a gay or a druggie is not an outrage. Sparing a family audience from a lesbian kiss is an outrage. No wonder they got upset when a Supreme Court justice said, “Merry Christmas.”


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