During the 2008 campaign, Hillary Clinton suggested that if the emergency phone rang at 3 a.m. in the White House, you wouldn’t want President Obama picking it up.

She was wrong. Obama wouldn’t pick it up in the first place. He’d let it go to answering machine. He’d be too busy chasing the nearest camera.

Obama is the “Girls Gone Wild” president: Stick a lens in front of him and he’ll take off his shirt, mince about like a coed, and babble nonsensical nothings to an audience oddly fascinated by his antics.

How else to explain Obama’s desperate injection of himself into the Oscars this past Sunday? Even as the Middle East goes up in flames, even as oil prices spike dramatically, even as the national debt skyrockets toward $19.6 trillion by 2015, Obama took time out to tackle a pressing question: What is his favorite movie song? Answer: “As Time Goes By,” from “Casablanca.” Feeling better about the world situation yet?

Obama had a busy week – at least in terms of pop culture. Thursday evening, Obama held yet another party at the White House, this time in honor of Motown music. Celebrity attendees included Stevie Wonder, Jamie Foxx, Smoky Robinson, John Legend, Seal, Sheryl Crow, Nick Jonas and Jordin Sparks. Jamie Foxx summed up the Obamas’ view of what it means to inhabit the “people’s house” in his rendition of Robinson’s “Get Ready”: “We won the election. White House, baby, so much fun!” Meanwhile, Muammar Qadafi shot people at will in the streets of Tripoli, and Americans struggled to pay their rent.

President Obama has become the Salahis of entertainment, cropping up in random places when he’s least wanted. We can’t escape him. He delayed the fifth game of the 2008 World Series, so he could broadcast a 30-minute infomercial for his campaign. He threw out the first pitch at the Major League Baseball All-Star Game in 2009. He did a 10-minute interview with Katie Couric during the 2010 Super Bowl broadcast. In both 2009 and 2010, he did interviews with ESPN to tell the world about his NCAA tournament brackets. In 2010, Obama showed up on “American Idol.” As commander-in-chief, he’s hit “The View,” “The Tonight Show,” “The Late Show” and “Jersey Shore.” OK, he hasn’t hit “Jersey Shore” … yet.

In fact, Obama is worse than the Salahis – at least the Salahis don’t use tax dollars to subsidize their antics. Obama doesn’t just crash other parties – he spends hundreds of thousands of taxpayer dollars to throw parties of his own. Not that Obama cares; as he put it, “This is a pretty big house so we get lonely. It’s hard for me to move around out there sometimes, so I got to bring the world to me.”

Poor baby.

Obama’s desperate need for attention is clearly a psychological condition. He drinks in applause like a washed-up movie star. It is usual for neglected children to develop narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), typically characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, a strong sense of entitlement, preoccupations with utopian fantasies, elitism, manipulative tendencies and pathological need for praise.

President Obama was abandoned by his parents during childhood. Now he exhibits the textbook symptoms of NPD. He thinks his powers are godlike in import; “I have a gift, Harry,” Obama once told Sen. Harry Reid. He believes he is entitled to positions of power and prestige. He has never worked a real job in his life, yet deigns to tell the rest of us that he embodies our hopes and dreams. He is obsessed with nonsensical utopian fantasies of one-world peace and harmony in which nuclear weapons are beaten into plowshares.

Obama is an elitist through and through, disdaining ordinary Americans as “bitter [people who] cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren’t like them.” He is manipulative in the extreme, seeing every crisis as an opportunity to magnify his personal power.

Most dangerous, he requires a constant stream of paeans to his persona. Radical Muslims, socialists, anti-Semites – so long as they clap, they’re worthy of his warmth. Obama strongly resembles a once-abused puppy; he doesn’t care who pets him, so long as he receives the petting.

With one exception: Obama has no interest in the attention or praise of Americans who challenge his radical agenda. To make himself subject to their philosophy would force him to acknowledge a fundamental truth: His parents abandoned him because they were bad parents, not because America is a “downright mean” country. Obama has told himself for decades that America’s selfishness forced his parents to make him a social outcast. To acknowledge now that the system was largely good and his parents were largely bad would fracture his fragile ego.

So expect to see President Obama on the next telecast of the next big event. He can’t stay away from the cameras, and he certainly won’t leave behind the enthusiastic hurrahs of his supporters. Mr. De Mille, he’s ready for his close-up.

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