Spin Doctor

“This argument about public media being ‘biased’ is a stalking horse. We report on soybean farmers and LGBTQ activism. We report on coal miners and eco-warriors. Having non-White voices and perspectives on air does not make us woke. Covering the existence of disagreement and difference in our country does not make us biased.” —NPR CEO Katherine Maher

Friendly Fire

“Look at what’s happening in this country right now. Like, I know you’re angry personally, but you’re not the f***ing victim here! We’re all living with what happened in this election.” | “You got a pardon! You’re fine.” | “Utter lack of self-awareness.” —"Pod Save America" hosts on Hunter Biden

For the Record

“Biden was there with [Obama] and Comey was there and Clapper — the whole group was there. Brennan. They were all there. … The leader of the gang was President Obama. Barack Hussein Obama. Have you heard of him? … He’s guilty. This was treason.” —Donald Trump

“According to declassified documents from the Trump/Russia collusion investigation, apparently the only parties NOT involved in the collusion conspiracy were Trump and Russia.” —Mark Alexander

“I don’t really care what the former First Drug Addict thinks.” —border czar Tom Homan in response to the Hunter Biden interview

Re: The Left

“Can you imagine getting a lecture on public safety from the party that has let child rapists and murderers into this country en masse? Do you have any idea how many little girls have been maimed and raped and killed by the illegal aliens … that they gleefully allowed into our nation? And they want to lecture us on public safety? They have destroyed the lives of countless thousands of Americans. And today, Democrats run sanctuary cities that protect and shield illegal aliens who have committed the most heinous crimes from deportation.” —White House Deputy Chief of Staff for Policy Stephen Miller

“The setup which Andrew Tate prescribes and promotes, where men have children by many different women, has lots of historical precedent. It does. … And today, this strategy, if we can call it that, is very popular in certain communities in this country. And you can always spot those communities because they’re the ones that are the most dysfunctional — the filthiest, most destitute, and crime-ridden places in the country. Show me the murder rate and average yearly income in any neighborhood, and I will tell you whether most of the children in that neighborhood have a father in the home or not.” —Matt Walsh repudiating Tate’s claim that men should be polygamous

“Despite overwhelming evidence that people are tired of politics replacing comedy, the left is determined to keep force-feeding us the same political gruel. … They are now suffering the consequences of their misguided decision.” —Cal Thomas

“When your show is cancelled because it’s unwatchable, unfunny, and losing $40 million per year, that’s not censorship, that’s capitalism.” —Charlie Kirk

Game of Chicken

“At the direction of Attorney General Bondi, I have communicated with counsel for Ms. [Ghislane] Maxwell to determine whether she would be willing to speak with prosecutors from the Department. I anticipate meeting with Ms. Maxwell in the coming days.” —Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche

Make America Healthy Again

“As part of its ongoing innovation agenda, this fall in the United States, the company plans to launch an offering made with U.S. cane sugar to expand its Trademark Coca-Cola product range.” —The Coca-Cola Company

Inquiring Minds Want to Know

“U.S. Olympic Committee bans transgender athletes from women’s sports. But can women still compete in men’s sports? Oh, wait, never mind.” —Mark Alexander