Who Broke It, Hakeem?

“We have a broken healthcare system, and unfortunately, Republicans have decided to break it even further.” —House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries (D-NY)

Friendly Fire

“It’s hard to see how the government shutdown and reopening is anything other than a defeat for the Democrats. … The shutdown reinforced the image of the Democrats as feckless. They promise wonderful-sounding new programs — free child care, for example — but in fact preside over bloated bureaucracies and inept execution. If America has an affordability crisis, it tends to be in places Democrats govern, like New York, Illinois and California, which all feature high taxes, soaring housing costs and stagnant outcomes in basic areas like education and infrastructure.” —CNN’s Fareed Zakaria getting it right

What?

“I feel painful about families of 9/11 in America, but you know we have to focus on reality. Reality based on CIA documents … that Osama bin Laden used Saudi people in that event for one main purpose, [which was] to destroy this relation, to destroy the American-Saudi relation. That’s the purpose of 9/11. … He knew that strong relation between America and Saudi Arabia, it’s bad for extremism, it’s bad for terrorism.” —Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman

Enemies Within

“This is a city of international law, and being a city of international law means looking to uphold international law. And that means upholding the warrants from the International Criminal Court, whether they’re for Benjamin Netanyahu or Vladimir Putin.” —New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani (“This is one of the most insane things I’ve ever heard a politician say. … Last time I checked, I was pretty sure New York is an American city under U.S. law.” —Greg Price)

If the Shoe Fits

“I say this is a party that’s got room for Marjorie Taylor Greene if she wants to come over.” —Rep. Jamie Raskin (D-MD)

Spin Doctor

“Biden and his officials were pointing to actual data that did indeed seem to paint a relatively positive picture of the economy. Trump and company, by contrast, are simply lying.” —economist Paul Krugman

Shot/Chaser

“The Left certainly stayed scientific.” —actor Patton Oswalt

“Parents should ask babies for ‘consent’ before changing their diapers: experts.” —New York Post headline

Belly Laugh of the Day

“I’m honored to stand before you as the very first former McDonald’s fry cook ever to become president of the United States.” —Donald Trump

Inquiring Minds Want to Know

“If [Democrats] were so concerned about the Epstein files and protecting the victims, why didn’t you do a darn thing about it for the four years of the Biden administration?” —House Speaker Mike Johnson (R-LA)

“Since Epstein had Stacey Plaskett’s ear someone needs to ask what other Democrat members of Congress was he controlling?” —Rep. Tim Burchett (R-TN)

And Last…

“How will we know if this [Epstein] bill has been successful? We will know when there are rich men in handcuffs being perp-walked to the jail.” —Rep. Thomas Massie (R-KY)